Halloween

Somebody said it was Halloween

I hadn’t a clue till then,

But the street was full of pumpkin heads

Carved out, with the candles in,

And the kids kept saying ‘trick or treat’

Though I didn’t know what for,

They must have thought I was pretty dumb

As I shooed them away from my door.

Then Mandy came out dressed as a witch

With a cloak and a pointy hat,

And waving a broom they call a ‘swish’,

‘So what is the point of that?’

‘Tonight the witches fly to their mass,

Under a harvest moon,

Shut your eyes as the broomsticks pass

Or they’ll put you to sleep, till noon.’

I thought I’d better prepare myself

So broke out my scatter gun,

The moment a witch would show herself

I swore that I’d have some fun,

With Jack O’ Lanterns the only light

As the night grew evil and dark,

I almost forgot that we lived next door

To the Mountainous Ski-Lift Park.

There wasn’t a Moon that eerie night,

It must have been hid by a cloud,

I could hear the chatter of witches, laughing,

How could they be so loud?

At midnight all of the chatter stopped

And everything went so still,

Just as the Moon popped out of the cloud

And the witches flew over the hill.

I saw their shapes up against the sky

Riding their broomsticks there,

With warty noses and pointy hats

And horrible tangled hair,

I didn’t think, I just raised my gun

And I blasted a spray of shot,

And watched each witch as she fell to earth

Whether they would, or not.

Mandy screamed and she seized the gun,

Ripped it out of my hands,

‘Have you gone crazy, what have you done?’

She wouldn’t cease her demands.

‘I saw them flying, up on their brooms,

I blew them out of the air.’

‘They didn’t fly, they just held on tight

Under the Ski-Lift chair.’

Whenever Halloween comes around

I tend to stay in my room,

And woe betide any witch that tries

Approaching me with a broom,

While Mandy locks up my scatter gun,

(That’s the one thing that will chafe),

Then goes to the witches at the door,

‘Yes, the Ski-Lift chair is safe!’

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[Barbz]

My Goodness, you actually turned Halloween into Horrorween. Obviously unaware of the traditional carved and lit pumpkins and the eerily costumed children begging "Trick or Treat" that you "shooed away from your door"......and the Witches!! Oh, the warty nosed, pointy hatted witches on their brooms, not a sight for your sore eyes or imagination.....Mandy didn't expect that you would raise your gun and spew the shot as they fell to the ground , from the Chair Lift of all things!! The Witches shall continue to appear each Halloween, you know, the night that you remain confined to your room, fearful of their arrival or approach.Very amusing and timely... Well done, DLP...Barbz

[sirA]

The ending was pretty clever, they weren't actually witches. Beautifully written!

[Insight "MH"]

Every witch flying on a broom should put a sign "flying on Ski-Lift chair, don't shoot!". I really enjoyed this piece so much, thank you for sharing.

Insight.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

what a delightful story, based on my favorite holiday of the year...something about Halloween just makes us get spooked...and lets our imaginations take that ride on the broom.

[RomaJ]

This was excellent, David. Had me smiling through out then laughing.. haha
Great piece to read before Halloween...and to think, I'm going to be a witch for Halloween,
I'll be sure to leave the broom at home..:)

[Celie Rose]

I liked your Halloween poem. I was waiting for the twist which was truly exciting."They didn’t fly, they just held on tight
Under the Ski-Lift chair." You really make the mind think. Well written.

[roarke]

hahahaah, I knew it by the third stanza, hahahaaha and the personality of your writing just carried me smiling to the end. It's the pumpkin heads with no light on walking around that is really frightening. hahaahahaaaha, loved it David.

[ANTO]

You took every Halloween trope, symbol and stereotype David and lined them up before shooting them all out of the sky whilst laughing your head orf. What can we do but laugh with you !!
Excellent poetry my friend. Remind me never to get in a Ski lift except on Halloween night when you are sans scatter gun.

[Mica Morgan]

This is a remarkable bit of irony for Halloween: the terrors being terrified. The dry humor throughout the poem was wonderful.

[Satan]

This isn't so bad, you only shot them after all David. I hear the Christian's used to burn them alive.