She Loves Me Not...

He was one of the cognoscenti,

She was one of the ‘up-for-sale’,

I knew that I shouldn’t fall for her

That she’d more than  likely bale,

But she came to me as a short-stop

On the way to a better deal,

She wouldn’t have even thought of,

(When she dumped me), how I’d feel.

 

I know it was my decision

To take her on at the start,

Then I didn’t know the bad effect

She’d have upon my heart,

But she gave to me unstinting,

That was how she really was,

Right to the time the know-all came

And told her what was what.

 

She’d gaze in a fascination

As he’d run off at the mouth,

Telling us in his wisdom

What he’d learnt, both north and south.

I couldn’t compete with his wallet,

I knew what his gifting cost,

And when he moved to the bedroom,

I knew that my cause was lost.

 

She shrugged it off in the morning,

She said it was only fair,

That I’d been suddenly just a friend

With benefits, to share,

But her life, it was slowly changing

And she sought stability,

That was the thing she found with him

That she couldn’t find with me.

 

I saw them off to the movies,

I watched as they went to dine,

I saw him caress her everywhere

In places that were mine,

I thought that I couldn’t stand it

The signs of their outward bliss,

Even though I had always known

In the end it would come to this.

 

But my love for her had curdled,

And my heart had turned to hate,

Revenge was upmost in my mind

When I planned an awful fate,

They ran around in a speedster,

A car with an open top,

I cut the lines to the power brakes

And I watched them both drive off.

 

I heard they were doing eighty

When the car didn’t take the curve,

And smashed them into an old oak tree

As it leapt right over the curb,

They both were thrown clean over the hood,

He broke his neck on the tree,

And she was crippled below the waist

But he was dead, you see.

 

I’d visit her at the hospice

As her health returned to fair,

But nothing would change the fact that she

Would spend her life in a chair.

I’d push her out in the garden

As I felt repentance soar,

And she would cry, ‘I want to die,’

While I fell for her, once more.

 

And she was happy to take me

At last, as the second best,

While in the guilt my tears were spilt

Though I tried to fake the rest,

I’m stuck with her in a wheelchair

And my life is merely dregs,

There isn’t a single benefit

For a girl with crippled legs.

 

We can’t make love in the morning,

We’ll never dance at a ball,

I’m tied for life to a crippled wife,

It’s my own fault, after all.

I shouldn’t have given in to hate

For a love that wasn’t mine,

And now I wonder if she loves me

Or just wants to pass the time.

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[Akshay Rawal]

Painful, and very honest. Very rare have I seen someone express things in love with a psychologically clear approach. People generally expatiate in shallow waters. Must have been very hard for the man to live with those last lines. A doubt that spoiled the taste of every effort, whether fair or unfair, he made to obtain her. Passion comes with non-realisation. Splendid write, Sir.

[A Soap Mess Stories]

Hate can be such a harsh word, it's no wonder why we should learn the art of forgivness and not seek revenge. Well done, David.

[Avinash]

This one is quite moving. Men often become vengeful when their hearts are broken. But this causes more harm than good. Love does not depend on person. Just like a natural phenomena it happens. We can't manufacture love, if we do then it is not.

[alf]

And another glass I raise in toast!!! Well done!! This is so very good!! Sad that we end up with exactly what we want . . . hmm!!! Love this, great rhyme and metre and another delectable read!! alf

[Lena M. P.]

Wow that was powerfully written. His love so great it crippled him and her in the end. Sad really.

[R Smith]

well your character here certainly paid a dear price for his revenge but not so dear a price as the lovers, seems to me the man got off the best as she was left so sadly crippled, its to his credit that in remorse he felt the need to care for her but when you consider his action in their accident or even attempted murder, then it seems to be stuck with her in a wheelchair is a terrible attitude to take, his self pity is an ugly thing to see in comparison to the suffering that he caused, having said all that, David this is one of your best ever writes, a truly inspired tale of revenge and pain, bravo my friend :)

[B]

David you are fabulous
in every sense of the word

Absolutely Fabulous

Hats off for you
WAW

[Barbz]

It' still the same old story, A fight for Love or Glory....a case of do or die! Now look at this man of cognoscenti......spilt a few tears, but left with a Life Empty.......Very interesting read, DLP...Barbz

[Marie]

Two revenges, and neither one is sweet.Her's was the more subtle, of course; she tied him to her helpless with guilt and obligation.
Reminds me of something I'm working on right now. A boy loves a girl who is permanently in a wheelchair. They come to a parting of the ways, and he takes up with someone who can walk with him, and dance with him and (probably) make love with him. All will not run smooth,however, and he will go back to his first love...

[Valentine]

How witty a tale. He got just what he deserved. Females need to be able to choose freely the same as the male. This was back in the slave trade I gather, although I know in other countries that is still happening. Nice write Mate. Valentine