The Witch of Willow Vale

‘There’s a crafty witch in Willow Vale

Putting spells on all the men,

She lures them out with a lurid tale

Of what they might miss, and then…

She chews them up and she spits them out

And they go home looking pale,

She just wants to prove to fretful wives

That she governs all things male.’

 

Pamela stood in the door and paused

And she looked direct at me,

‘If you should fall for her witches charms

You can go, I’ll set you free!

I’ll not take seconds from lovesick men

Who come when the witch is through,

You’ll not come in through my door again,

That’s right, I’m looking at you!’

 

So I threw my hands up in the air

And I said, ‘Why pick on me?

Have I so much looked at a scheming witch

When she’s up to her deviltry?’

‘That may be true but your time is due

You’re the last one in the Glen,

She’ll get to you when she sees you’re new

For a perfect score of ten.’

 

‘I promise Pamela, I’ll be true,’

But she said to call it quits,

‘An easy promise that you can’t keep

Is a lie upon your lips.’

Then I got mad and I said I’d had

Being judged up front, was lame,

I said I’d travel to Willow Vale

Play the witch at her own game.

 

‘Well just remember that if you do

A touch is all it will take,

A simple kiss that will bring you bliss

That would be your first mistake.

Don’t think you might get away with it

For I have my little spies,

I even know how the spell will grow

If you look deep into her eyes.’

 

So I set off for the witch’s haunt

In a cottage, in the vale,

And hearing Pamela’s final taunt

‘You won’t live to tell the tale!’

I pursed my lips, and gritted my teeth

As I knocked on the witch’s door,

It swung out wide, to show her sat

By a cauldron on the floor.

 

She didn’t even look up at me

She was sorcering a spell,

Dropping roots in the cauldron there

And muttering as they fell,

Her hair fell over her shoulders and

Her face was in the shade,

And then she stopped and she looked at me

‘Did you come here to get laid?’

 

I blushed and stammered and caught my breath,

This wasn’t going well,

My blood was running as cold as death

As I fell beneath her spell.

She’d painted her lips and eyelids black

And her fingernails like claws,

She said, ‘I’m ready to claw your back

You need only say, ‘I’m yours!’’

 

Her dress she slid up above her knees

To reveal her silken thighs,

Her bodice open, she leaned right back

And I had to shut my eyes.

‘I came to tell you you’re not for me,

That you weave your spells in vain,

I have a love that is true, you see

I don’t need to play your game.’

 

She bounded up to her feet and cried

‘A kiss for a lonely witch!

I’m only asking a single kiss,

What could be wrong with this?’

I shook my head and I turned to go,

And I reached for the cottage door,

Then the wig came off and I heard her laugh,

And there lay Pam, on the floor!

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[Barbz]

How did Pamela know, of nine under the spell. Of the witch seducing them, upon her charms, they fell. Was it just a tale she told, to test her lovers claim. That he loved, just her alone. He tried, to her explain. Enough, he thought, I'll go confront the witch, I won't be ten. Falling from the spell,you brew, seducing other men. Just a little kiss, she begged, as he ran for the door, then he turned around and found, his Pam, a witch no more!!! You almost caught me with this twist, David,,,,,or did you? Great work...Barbz

[Sindu]

Hey! I expected that! That's a first! Nicely played pam but pure determination on his part. So she's a witch or a brilliant storyteller? Some food for thought. A Fairytale-esque write David

[Bright Ocean Star]

I love this one, too! Oh, Pamela, the Wicked Witch of the Willow Vale. Very nice, David...:)

[Marie]

That's certainly one way of proving a husband's fidelity. Although I feel she should have been more trusting in the first place and not judeged her husband before he'd even had a chance to do anything wrong. I think that marriage is in trouble.

[ANTO]

‘An easy promise that you can’t keep
Is a lie upon your lips.’ - DLP, I love the way you can reorganise a sentence like a balloon-modeller into a wild shape that would give my old English Language teacher a nose bleed and it still makes perfect sense - you are like...Yoda's script writer or something.

A honey-trap !! Hah ! laughing here. Oh those women - can't be up to their wee tricks lol
Really funny David. Thanks for the laughs mate!

[R Smith]

naughty Pam, i believed she was just testing him but then how did she arrange it with the witch, guess she would have none of it, did Pam kill the witch and take her place...not likely, so Pam becomes the witch and is guilty of seducing a whole village, then i read some more reviews, clever David there was no witch just a story spun by Pam to test her husband who passed with flying colours....lucky for Pam he did'ent thinking her to be the witch run her through with a sword or dagger even, great work as always :)

[Ellen Hammond]

It would seem that Pam had seen too many broken promises so decided rather than just accept a man's word she would put him to the ultimate test to see if he would or could keep his promises. Love how you weave your tales.

[Valentine]

Well, all of those men were never used again...and He being the only non cheater.....gets the woman who cheats. Isn't that the breaks. One nice guy in the area and he gets the bimbo witch. Laughing as I just can't figure out where all of these ideas for you writes come from. Just keep writing please. Kathie

[MomzillaNC]

Ooo! What a wicked woman! His "love that is true" is the witch who's had every other man in Willow Vale?

[David Lewis Paget]

I'm more than surprised that everyone accepted that the story Pamela told her lover was true. In fact there is no witch, no seduction of all those fellows in the Vale, only a very clever scheme to test her lover's faithfulness. What does this say about our willingness to accept everything we're told as gospel, even when it's such a bizarre story as the one concocted here?

[MomzillaNC]

Oh! Sneaky snarky commentary on humanity's readiness to delude ourselves! I completely agree with the sentiment and blush that I was caught by the ruse.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A witch to take us all! well done great read