To Bed! To Bed!

‘To bed! To bed!’
Said Sleepy-head;
‘Tarry awhile,’ said Slow;
‘Put on the pan,’
Said Greedy Nan;
‘We'll sup before we go.’

        (from Mother Goose)

They sat at the kitchen table as

The candle flickered low,

And Greedy Nan put on the pan

To indulge her sister, Slow,

While Sleepy Weepy Annabelle

Blotted her book with tears,

And thought of her Beau from long ago

Who she hadn’t seen for years.

 

‘Why doesn’t Roger notice me,

Why doesn’t Alan Dell?

I’m wearing the dress cut low for me

And I’ve hitched my skirt as well.

I’ve a pretty turn to my ankle, so

You’d think it would drive them wild.’

‘But men are a mystery,’ said Slow,

‘And Alan Dell’s a child.’

 

While over the pan stood Greedy Nan,

Was cracking a turkey’s egg,

A lump of yeast and a slice of beast

And a single spider’s leg.

With a wing of bat and an ounce of fat

And a toe of frog for the spell,

She needed to turn her sister off

From her crush on Alan Dell.

 

For Greedy Nan was the eldest girl

And would have to marry first,

The other two would wait in the queue

Or their fortunes be reversed,

The omelette sizzled, and in the pan

She added before they saw,

A piece of some Devil’s Trumpet plant

For the mating game meant war.

 

She sliced the omelette into half

And she served them up a piece,

‘Didn’t you want?’ said Annabelle

But Slow enjoyed the feast.

‘I’m not that terribly hungry now

I’ve cooked it up in the pan,

I think I’ll just have a slice of bread,’

Said the scheming Greedy Nan.

 

They finished up and they sat awhile,

And they mused about their fate,

‘If Greedy Nan isn’t married soon,

For us it will be too late.’

‘I’ve set my sights on a country squire,’

Said Nan, without a blink,

Lured them away from her secret fire

To confuse what they might think.

 

‘The room is woozy, spinning around,

I’d better get me to bed,’

Said Annabelle, while Slow with a frown

Saw Dwarves dance in her head.

But Greedy Nan was cleaning the pan

To clear all signs of the spell,

Her back was turned to her sisters, spurned

For the sake of Alan Dell.

 

And when he came in the morning

Greedy Nan was sat by the door,

While Annabelle and her sister Slow

Were lying dead on the floor,

‘I didn’t mean it to kill them, Al,

It was only a simple spell,’

But as he cuffed and led her away

He frowned, did Alan Dell.

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[Barbz]

Oh, what fun to read a poem, inspired by Nursery Rhyme. A tale about three sisters, running out of time. The oldest, who was greedy, had to marry first, lest their fortunes see it's end, and that would be the worst. She conjured up a plan, she, who's name was Nan, cooking up a devils dish, then marry, AL, the man. Her mission was accomplished, as her sisters died, eating up that ghoulish grub, greedy hadn't tried. Her lament to Alan, when he saw them dead, she did not mean to kill them, but cuffed, away he led. The moral of the story, do not resort to greed, for in the end, when all is said, regret will be your need! What a kick, Sir David........oh, for a trip thru your head.........Barbz

[Helen Crutchett]

David I am laughing so much I can hardly type. What a fantastic nursery tale! I just loved every single thing about this.......still laughing! :)

[A Soap Mess Stories]

Didn't expect that ending...another great tale...

[Marie]

Who would have thought Alan Dell would be a constable? Greedy Nan should have been more careful--not only in her choice of spells, but in her choice of men.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

One finds themselves sucking there thumb and drinking hot chocolate reading this piece! Bravo - a new fairy-tale!

[Alexia Rose]

I really like the rhythm of this piece. I find it very creative that you took a quote from a Mother Goose nursery rhyme and put a surprising twist on it. Well done!

[Valentine]

So...crafty Nan who in the last two lines, it says he cuffed and led her away. Did he cuff her or she cuff him? Love the tale. Keep them coming please. Kathie

[R Smith]

great rhyming David, would be a good addition to Grimm's fairy tales, maybe she overcooked the spell and left the sister's dead but it gave us great entertainment, thank you :)

[ANTO]

There is too many to mention here DLP. The whole thing is a fairground ride from comedy to tragedy with quaintness en route (the turn to her ankle - harks wayy back, wonderfully).
Im going to ration these to myself. Great stuff
:D

[MomzillaNC]

Well… bugger! Guess I have to scrap the nursery rhyme twist for this one! You beat me to it and I couldn't imagine even approaching this masterful offering. Greedy attitudes is probably at the bottom of most of the stupid, horrible things people do to each other. Greed just leads to jealousy and discontent and the drive to take what you want by any means. At least your greedy miscreant didn't gain her goal. Their fortune's lost anyway.