Mother of the Bride

I was introduced to her mother

One Whit Sunday, down at the Hall,

They said that this was a ritual

And suffered by one and all,

She wanted to check your hands were clean

That you had no flaw on your skin,

I wanted to marry her daughter

But if I had, I couldn’t come in.

 

They led me in through the servant’s door

Down a passageway to the rear,

Marching me past some gloomy rooms

Was an ancient Grenadier,

He didn’t reply to a single word

That I said, his face was grim,

Then into a room with a chandelier

That was gloomier than him.

 

She sat at the end of a table, veiled

And motioned me to a chair,

The dust was thick on the table-top

And I’m sure there was dust on her,

I’d heard she once was a beauty

One of the greatest in the land,

But she sat there bowed like a coffin shroud

As she raised her withered hand.

 

‘Show me your hands and your fingers,’ she

Then whispered in gravel tones,

Her voice like the dying embers of

The ashes of human bones,

I raised my sleeves to the elbows and

I held them out to her stare,

‘I’m going to marry your daughter,’

I declared, ‘so be aware!’

 

She flinched, as if I had slapped her

Then she said, as hard as nails,

‘I’ll write the end of the chapter,

I’ll not heed your rants and rails.

My daughter won’t marry anyone

That I don’t approve, you’ll see,

You think that you are the only one

Come cap in hand to me?’

 

‘There was a time, I was in my prime

When the world was at my door,

And I could have married anyone

But the love that I had was poor,

A rival had him imprisoned, just

To get him out of the way,

Then said I could buy his freedom if

I’d lie with him for a day.’

 

‘My love was such that I put my trust

That this Earl would keep his word,

So slept with him on a Sunday, then

He put my love to the sword.

He said that I’d have to keep his bed

For I had no place to go,

That I was fit for playing the w***e

And he’d let my friends all know.’

 

‘I couldn’t cry, I would rather die

But my first thought was revenge,

My heart was broken forevermore

But my love would be avenged.

I ran his lordship an evil bath

With herbs and salts disguised,

Then held him down while it ate his flesh,

And put out both of his eyes.’

 

I leapt to my feet on hearing that,

And staggered back from my chair,

‘So now you know I’m a monster,

If you cross me, just beware!’

‘I think you’ve told me a pack of lies,

But I love your daughter, true!

I’m going to marry her come what may,

I swear, in spite of you!’

 

She rose and beckoned me follow her

And she led me through the gloom,

Down through a flagstone stairwell and

Into a tiny room,

A man lay there in an iron bath

That was filled to the brim with oil,

And only his face was still intact

Though his eyes had both been spoiled.

 

‘He hasn’t an ounce of flesh on him,

The oil just keeps him alive,

He’ll never get out of this bath again,’

But he’d heard us both arrive.

‘For God’s sake, kill me and end it now,’

He groaned from his oily tomb,

‘I will when you bring my Martin back,’

She whispered, there in the gloom.

 

I couldn’t get out of there fast enough

But I’d lost my way inside,

I knew I couldn’t get married now

I was far too terrified.

She called me back and she raised her veil

And she said, ‘He stole my grace!’

I saw to my horror that syphilis

Had eaten part of her face!’

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[Harmony Babin]

Wow, what poor woman and man! Such tragic story. Very creepy, but very GOOD! Great job (:

[minisla]

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

[Angel]

What a creepy tale!
I don't think that girl will ever find a husband.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

Oh, dear God! That poor woman; that poor man. How many lives were destroyed by one man's lust. Whew!

[Baby Ricochet]

Man don't marry into that crowd.

[Marie]

THat's really horrible...this suitor was well out of such a mess...