The Water God

I heard the rumble of thunder rolling

Over the mountain top,

And then the cry of Desirée calling,

‘When is it going to stop?’

The dam had broken its earthen banks

The plain was starting to flood,

The river raged by the cottage door

And the floor was covered in mud.

 

I knew that something was very wrong

For Desirée cried and cried,

I’d asked before what was going on

But to tell the truth, she lied,

She said that she was responsible

But she wouldn’t tell me why,

And her tears mixed with the rain until

A week had passed us by.

 

I stared on up at the brooding sky

With its thunderheads in line,

And thought: ‘Another few days of this

Will herald the end of time!’

The cottages down on the valley floor

Had gone, right up to the roof,

Desirée wept by the cottage door,

‘I’d better tell you the truth!’

 

She wept and said, ‘On the mountain top

I discovered the altar stone,

I know I shouldn’t have touched it, but

I thought I was all alone,

I traced my fingers over the runes

To see what I could find,

And all the beauty I’d ever known

Came flooding into my mind.’

 

‘And then the gods of the firmament

Of earth and sea and air,

Came leaching out of the altar stone

And tangled up in my hair,

They said that I was so beautiful,

Too good for human kind,

I had a choice, I could marry one

Or the gods would strike me blind!’

 

The lightning struck as we stood out there

And felled a mighty oak,

‘They said they’d give me a week…’

But then it thundered, as she spoke.

‘They’re telling me that my time is up,

We’ll meet by Llandrindod,

And there I’ll marry Barinthus,

He’s the Celtic Water God.’

 

The rain came down in a torrent as

She turned and went from me,

And walked right down to the river bank

Where she said she’d set me free.

Desirée walked in the water and

Was swept away by the tide,

Down to the Bay of Aberfaye

As I shook my head, and cried.

 

The skies are blue in Aberfaye

And the thunderheads have gone,

Up on the mountain top I took

An axe to the altar stone.

They point me out in the village street

And the tourists think it odd,

They whisper: ‘There goes the man who lost

His wife to the Water God!’

 

David Lewis Paget

Reviews

[roarke]

The meter made this piece fly by. Gods, storms, raging rivers, unrequited love, whew.... I don't think you could have squeezed in anymore. The life of a goddess, or the life of a blind mortal.... hmm, a weighty decision.

I know there will be more, so I'll just sit right here and wait.

[Mark]

Based on Juno's misadventures with Jupiter (or Hera's with Zeus, if you prefer), I believe I'd take the blindness!!

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Had to re-read this piece, but strikes a nerve indeed.

[Becky C Strukamp]

What can I add that has not already been said. You never disappoint. A masterful story teller, one like no other, never have a read such captivating tales. You are a master poet!

[Veronica Chandler]

Such a joyful, intriguing read and I cannot thank you enough for the read request. I learn so much when I am immersed in your work, yet understand so little. I struggle when I'm in the grip of the tales you tell; shall I keep on writing and learn from your skill, or shift my focus to reader. I know I will keep on writing and could not stop if I wanted, but your's will be the kind of tales to which I will aspire.

[HaleythePoet]

This was beautiful and I loved it!

[A Soap Mess Stories]

Wonderful story David. Loved how the water god won the round.

[K. D. Kromminga]

The point I saw was of not making others suffer for our mistakes. Sure she would have suffered as a blind woman if she didn't marry one of the gods from the altar, but could have stayed with a husband she loved. Instead she sacrificed her life and love for the greater good and saved the village. I have to say this is one of the few almost bittersweet endings I've seen you write. A happy ending for the village, and ending of regret for the narrator when the villagers don't appreciate the meaning of the sacrifice his wife made. Great poem from a master poet.

[Tate Morgan]

That was really great .I often wonder where your great meanderings come from .It is obvious to me you stayed a child as time marched on. It is a blessing trust me I am one too.

[Mark]

You are one of a kind, my friend--and proud and humbled I am to be considered such, if I may say! One week British history, the next Welsh mythology, next week you'll be challenging Rick Puetter with an astrophysics poem! You seem, as another has noted, to have no limits to either your imagination, or your curiousity and fields of interest. Another fine epic from the Master's pen!

[Michael Corkill]

Very well written. Great storytelling meter and flow. Great job, This merits further investigation of your work!

[Valentine]

In olden times so many believed tales like this to be true..now when one is read, some say they are worshiping gods like in a fantasy..You write things so well..I think I would havew went blind,,I do not like deep water..Kathie