Sleep Medicine

Sleep Medicine

Lately I've become obsessed

Well, some call it an addiction

With this substance that seems so harmless

I mean, it makes me feel good, right?

No, wrong. It messes with your head

Thoughts will flicker in your mind every millisecond

Like a light that's so close to burning out

And your mind that's filled with secrets

Just dying to tell

It slowly empties the thoughts

One by one

You assume it's going to kill you

But instead you wake up

And repeat the same process

I'm dying to tell you

How I'm surrounded

In emptiness and pain

Like its a blanket with my name written all over it

And I don't understand how this substance works

All I know is that it works

And it makes me forget the world

Just for the night

Out of all these things

I just can't help but wonder

What this substance could do for me

If I drank it all

Because I don't want to feel

What it's going to be like when you're gone

And so I use this ill-flavored substance

To forget what it's like to feel anything at all

I'm sorry I'm so fucked up, mom

I'm sorry I daydream about death

Like he's some kind of knight in shining armor

Begging me to let him save me

I'm sorry i'm like this

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry

I don't wish to be this way

But with death I shall stay

You want me to heal

But this substance helps me to not feel.

Reviews

[jacob erin-cilberto]

your write pain in a really "in your face" confessional style that romps across the page...i also saw the medicine to be writing...helps to ease the pain quite a bit, to let it out...put some of that harsh feeling onto the page...helpful, for sure.

[Laymeto.rest]

I can relate to this on many personal levels.
Your pain is beautiful.