The Burden of Freedom

Cutting through the sky
with its metal wings;

all clear ahead, 

well spirited, unlimited

like in the sweetest dreams.

Sensation is hindered

by small favors;

weighing more under obligations, 

caring eager souls to their promised destinations.

Each flight is slower, 

dragging through the light air; 

trapped under their bleeding hearts, 

for salvation among clouds and saints;

as they reach for feather wings with their names.

Old now, 

rusty, empty,

nothing of joyful flight left;
only with the message that gnaws its mind;

freedom is a matter of state

not of the sky.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

Your words written like a ancient and wise poet.
"Old now,
rusty, empty,
nothing of joyful flight left;
only with the message that gnaws its mind;
freedom is a matter of state
not of sky."
I loved the above lines. Freedom is a open word. If you never knew freedom. Hard to define. Thank you Satoshi for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote

[Satoshi IroTzu]

Respect, Coyote

I appreciate you sharing your insightful and honest comment.

[Coyote Poetry]

I liked this poem and you are welcome my friend.

[Bear]

Critique: (Cutting through sky) the sky - The noun phrase sky is missing a determiner before it.
(not of sky) the sky - The noun phrase sky is missing a determiner before it.

Review: Nice imagery that empowers the metaphorical sense of your poem. A pleasure to read Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!

[Satoshi IroTzu]

Respect, papa-Bear

I appreciate your honesty , and your aid, in your comments.