Time: A Reflection

 

Time goes on--

One minute after another. 

Or does it stand still? 

Or does it run backwards? 

I sit here in a darkened, silent room, 

In a chair, the fabric of the armrest 

Rough against my bare skin. 

My back pressed into the chair, 

Feet flat on the floor. 

My eyes close, 

Listening to the silence, 

Trying to clear 

My mind. 

I take slow, measured breaths, 

One after another, 

Seeking a state of calm. 

But peace eludes me-- 

Images of my past and present 

Flicker restlessly through my mind. 

Some of the images of my past are troubling, 

Bringing thoughts of failures 

And feelings of sadness: 

A failed marriage, 

Loss of friends and family, 

Times spent feeling lost and alone. 

Others remind me 

Of achievements I have made, 

And the good feelings 

That accompanied them. 

Then come thoughts of my present: 

Have I learned from my past mistakes, 

Or am I doomed to repeat them? 

Can I build on what I've achieved, 

Or was it a fleeting success? 

And then thoughts of what might the future 

Hold in store for me, cross my mind. 

Will it be more of the same, 

Or will things be brighter?  

Focusing on my breathing, 

I try once again to calm my mind. 

This time reminding myself’ 

That I am a different person now.  

Time has passed 

And things are not the same. 

After some time, I achieve the  

The calmness that I had sought. 

The onrush of thoughts and doubts 

Slow, and finally ebb. 

Sitting for a few moments longer, 

Enjoying the sense of calm and peace, 

Reaching out in the darkness, I turn  

On the light beside me, and in this new light. 

I open my eyes, standing up on my feet, 

With a renewed sense of hope and  

Determination, I know that what 

Ever comes my way, I am ready 

To face the world once more.