So Much More Than You Know

Stronger I Am

There was a time

When my dad asked

Why I call my mom

But never called dad

See back then I always called him by his first name

It wasn’t an attempt  at disrespect

I think it was just bottled and misplaced rage

I’ve never remembered a mom before my mom

I think that just helped us get along

As a kid

I was always waiting for my father to come back

But of course he never did

And I was holding on to this memory of him

But the memory started to fade

And I grew angry

You dad became the recipient of my rage

 

You’d always say

That you loved me

That you would be my father as long as I needed you to be

But I wasn’t ready

To let go of calling you Eddie

Because Eddie I know can trust

And the last time I put my faith in man called dad

He turned his back on me

And never once looked back

 

I needed to let go

I didn’t really know

How

 

But soon I found an outlet

Into my writing I poured

All my hurt, pain, confusion

Anger and feelings of neglect

And only once I had let go of all that

That I could see that my anger had blinded me

From one simple fact

I’d spent my life waiting

Waiting for a dad I already had

Somebody who didn’t know to give up on me

You just kept coming back

And the more I pushed you away

The more you’d push back

I could say it back then

But I can say it now

You never idea how much I appreciated that

You raised me

In to the man

I’m proud I’ve grown to be

And I thank you for that.

So just know

I do love you

Dad.

 

B.C

Reviews

[Junert]

Wow, very emotional, I'm sure in his own way he does love you too.

[Lourisa]

What a great story you shared! The progression of the poem is great and the end beautiful.

[Dark Tower]

Thank you for your kind words Lourisa.

[Coyote Poetry]

Words do have great meaning. When I'm called father and grandpa make me feel I'm someone. I enjoyed your story. Names are earned, not given with ease. Thank you for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Dark Tower]

Exactly. A name is just a word, what makes it special is the bond that carries.