Its Better Than Regretting

An upcoming wedding haunts Charlie.

Tick. The onyx black hand of the plastic clock, hanging on the kitchen wall, moved. Tock. Again. Under the kitchen table, Charlie’s foot began tapping. He was trying to look forward but his eyes kept being pulled back to that clock. He willed his foot to stop. But in it’s stead his hand began tapping.

            Charlie desperately tried to keep his mind from centering on that one event. That one event that was happening right now. The one event that ... he wondered if she ... damnit. He’d done it again. In a trash can right by the wooden kitchen table, an ornate invitation lay ripped to shreds. It felt good while he was tearing it up, but the moment he had finished he felt regret.

            Tick.

            He stood up abruptly and walked into the living room. His dog �" a golden retriever �" followed him lazily with his eyes, as he lay on the floor. His name was Kangaroo because she always ... damnit. Why couldn’t he just keep her out of his head? Charlie went over to his expensive CD player and pushed a few buttons. The radio would take his mind off things.

            The smooth voice of the radio guy sounded crystal clear in the large speakers, “... and that’s it for sport news. We’ll go right back to music,” Charlie closed his eyes, just what he wanted to hear, “starting with a blast from the not-so-distant past. Here goes Busted with “Crashed the Wedding ...” 

            Charlie’s eyes flashed open and he quickly pressed the off-button on the stereo, just as the first notes started coming through. Not radio then. His eyes travelled around the living room. They centered on the large plasma TV. That would work. Picking up the remote, Charlie planted himself in his leather sofa and pressed a button on the device.

            The TV came to life. An advertisement for a soda was playing. Charlie breathed a sigh of relief.  It promptly ended, and another image came on-screen, a drama show of some kind. A man in a suit kneeled in front of a stunning girl and presented a ring. Charlie just stared. “Will you marry me, Mary?” 

            The girl smiled brilliantly, showing perfect white teeth. “Oh, Vance, of course.”

            Charlie’s fingers scrambled for the off button on the remote. He found it, just as the girl put on a ring with a ridiculously large diamond. The picture died, and Charlie leaned his head back into the sofa. He threw the remote control beside him and ran his fingers through his slightly greasy brown hair. His eyes stared up into the ceiling.

            Why wasn’t it him with a ring? And why had she said yes even though it wasn’t ... damnit.

            He sighed and stood up. Almost without a conscious decision, he began pacing from the living room to the kitchen area and back. What was he supposed to do? Tick. Involuntary glance towards the clock. How long did these things take? What part was she at now? Damnit. Damnit, damnit.  “DAMNIT!” His shout surprised even himself.

            Even Kangaroo was affected. He stood up, and stared at his master for just a moment, then moved leisurely into the living room. Charlie thought he could see where this was going. One of Kangaroo’s toy’s �" a pink rubber bone �" was located just beneath the cabinet housing the TV. “No ... Kang, I’m not in the mood ...” His brows furrowed a bit as Kangaroo went in another direction, towards the living room table, and picked something off it into his mouth and then came back to present it to Charlie.

            Charlie blinked a few times when he saw what it was. He looked into the brown eyes of his dog, and then back at the object. It was his keys, among them, his car keys. “Kang ... what are ...” His heart was beating in his chest, uncomfortably fast. Tick. Tock! TICK! “Damnit.” In that moment Charlie made a decision. He ripped the keys from his dog’s mouth and ran to his front door, practically jumped into his shoes, opened the door, closed it, and ran outside.

            Would he make it? Didn’t matter, he had to try.

            He reached his car �" an older Honda model �" opened it after some frantic fumbling, and got in. An Hawaiian hula girl on his dashboard shook when he slammed the door closed. He inserted the keys into the ignition and started the car. Driving, in his heart-thumping stomach-burning condition wasn’t fun. Especially the part where he landed behind a slow-moving old guy with a hat, and then a slow-moving tractor, and then a slow-moving ... he didn’t really see the driver, but the car was one of those extra small new models. 

            And of course red lights had to haunt him throughout the city, as is custom when hurry is preferred. But at last he made it to the church. His heart went into overdrive as he saw the vacant parking lot. Was he too late? He knew they hadn’t gone for a big church audience but ...

            Having come all this way, Charlie parked the car all the same. He got out, and closed the door. The church loomed over him, an impressive gray construct. He walked to the door, hesitated for a second, then opened it. “Damnit,” he breathed. There seemed to be no one there.

            But at the sound of his voice, a head he hadn’t noticed at first turned. He and she locked eyes, but neither said a word. The woman turned back, and Charlie approached her with careful steps. When he reached her, she looked up at him for a moment, then cleared a space on the bench she was sitting it at, beside her. Charlie sat down.

            She was wearing her wedding gown he noticed. God, how beautiful she looked. Regardless of that, he kept his eyes front. “So ... where is everybody?”

            “No one really came. I cancelled it. The wedding. Just before it was supposed to start. I called everyone I could reach, and then stayed here to tell those who hadn’t heard.”

            Charlie frowned. “You didn’t call me.”

            Adele glanced at him and smiled. “I know. I wanted you to come here. I knew you eventually would.”

            “Oh.” Charlie felt tricked for some reason. “But why?”

            “Why what? Why did I cancel it, or why did I want you to come?”

            “Both.”

            Adele’s face became serious and her eyes centered on the back of the church bench in front of them. “I ... have cancer. I have only six months to live, and I didn’t feel I could marry anyone right now. That’s why I cancelled the wedding.”

            Charlie’s eyes widened, as he stared at the woman he loved. Those black curls, the full lips, the dark eyes ... “What? Why didn’t you ...” He stopped because he could see a smile breaking out on her lips, and laughter shaking her body. “Oh. Ha-ha, very funny.”

            She smiled at him, her eyes dancing. “I’m sorry, I just couldn’t resist.” Adele rolled her eyes. “Why do you think I cancelled the wedding, you dufus?” She became more serious.  “I love you. Not him. Always have. I was just too ...” She shook her head. “Blind to see it.”

            Charlie stared. “You love me?”

            “Yeah. And what, you’re telling me you came here to watch my wedding and congratulate me?” That knowing look in her eyes made Charlie feel as transparent as a ghost.

            “No.” He swallowed. Why ... why was he so scared now? He couldn’t be scared. That’s what got him into this mess in the first place. And now here she was and now here he was and ... “I love you too.” 

            The bright smile he got from her made him glow inside. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted to hear from you.” They stared at each other for a moment. Then they kissed. The kind of kiss that happens in a fraction of a second by a mutual decision at just the right moment, and contains the sort of raw passion that left them both breathless, when they finally pulled apart.

            “Uhm ... so ...” Charlie tried focusing his thoughts. “Why are you still in your wedding dress?”

            “Oh, this?” She stood up and managed to twirl in a circle despite the limited room between the benches. “I don’t know. I guess I just wanted to wear it since I had it tailor made and all.”

            “It looks nice.”

            “Yeah. I think so too. Hey,” her eyes lit up with a mischievous glow, “lets go have dinner at that hamburger place down the street. I’m starving.”

            “Let me guess, you’re gonna wear the dress?” Adele nodded, smiling. Charlie sighed, but he was smiling too. Her craziness was one of the things he loved the most about her. He stood up, and offered her his hand. She took it. “Let’s go.”