Scribbling

My legs are hurting
I have lost count; of how long
I've been climbing
A foot in front of the other,
a step after a step
An endless cycle, resembling
the curse of ouroboros
I'm not sure when it all started
and I definitely cannot see the end.
Sisyphus' retribution
for cheating death is ironically
similar to how it feels to be living

I want to hide
Safely tucked away from the world
I want to be perceived
The center of the target; the eye of a bird.
I want to be pitied, coddled, like a child
to be loved and to be hated,
be accepted and be exiled.
Frightening thoughts intrude the depths of my mind
like how I sometimes wish I had a stalker
Just so that I would feel seen
Just so that I know
that there's atleast someone watching me.

I haven't felt pretty in years,
And there's nothing I do about it.
Except let such thoughts ferment and rot my brain
Hoping that maybe someday
I might feel better about myself

Everyday is the same
I am climbing the stairs still
And I will keep doing it
till my legs give out
Because I'm too afraid to find out
what would happen if I stop

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree dear Elizabeth. Sometimes we feel like we are walking in a maze.
Everyday is the same
"I am climbing the stairs still
And I will keep doing it
till my legs give out
Because I'm too afraid to find out
what would happen if I stop"
I feel the same way and thank you for sharing the amazing poetry and your thoughts.
Coyote

[Elizabeth]

Thank you so much Coyote! I'm glad you could relate to this poem...I feel like some experiences are truly universal

[Coyote Poetry]

I did Elizabeth and you are welcome.

[Chris Shaw]

A sad poem to read. An unpleasant place to be. I felt a lonely unnoticed person here who is struggling with the day to day. Maybe suffering from depression. Keep moving, is a good thing to remember. However difficult, keep moving. I hope there will be better days ahead. You express your emotions well.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you so much Chris for your kind words. I really needed to hear this today

[Relic]

This is incredibly sad to read. I took care of my father for years until he finally passed away. He couldn't walk or see. Your words are personal and deeper tham most because they come from painful experience.

My aunt is now 92. She always says you have to keep moving. Being alone - as I am - can be lonely and scary. I wish nothing but the best for you. And yes, keep moving.

[Elizabeth]

I'm so sorry about your dad. Your aunt is absolutely correct. I understand feeling alone and isolated all too well. I wish the best for you ...sending you all my lovee

[Lydia Shutter]

Oh yes, as we age, things begin to change and not in a good way. Keep on going and doing what you can while you can. That is the best way to live. Never stop putting one foot in front of the other! Honest emotions expressed well here. Lydi**

[Elizabeth]

Thank youu for your kind words!!

[carl]

well expressed deep desire to be seen, pursued, found, taken, owned, cherished. All truth for all souls. Thanks for the post. -carl

[Elizabeth]

thank you so much Carl, I really appreciate your kind words

[Cyprian Van Dyke]

Wow, I really like your language; your manner of writing. You use powerful depictions. The poem is full of emotion that I could feel so easily. The ending was also very strong like I/you were being chased to it but I still couldn't stop, as you said at the end. Wonderfully explained and expressed. tyfs

[Elizabeth]

Thank you so much for your kind words!! I'm glad that you liked it

[willweb]

That was very deep indeed. I could feel the struggle in this, the exertion of energy on a never ending quest to find some kind of truth when to me I believe it is much easier to find than that. Nicely done

[Elizabeth]

Thank you!!! I'm glad you liked it