us

fireflies

his smile seems to ache

his laugh but a mask

his life seems so fake

and his cover seems to last

her wrists are too scared

her mind is so broken

his name sings in her heart

her life feels so hopeless

together the seem whole

together the have hope

together they share soul

together the sing the same note

for my forbidden love

Author's Note

please tell me your thoughts both good and bad .... I need all the help I can get

Reviews

[Elliot B.]

Wow. Beautiful! I stink at stuff like this, I actually write music, not words, and so I'm totally out of my element here. Just one thing, and that is if "scared" is supposed to be "scarred," as if from past attempts on her life. Also, were the "the"s supposed to be "they"s? But anyway I loved this a lot!

[AcasualPawn]

Good poem, interesting writing, catching words......

[EJ's Horror]

I loved the A,b,a,b patten. I found it sad, but a good reflection on how a forbidden love may work.

[DarkArtz 0703]

thank you

[King Spark]

I love this so much It really speaks the truth hehehe