From The Journal of Elizabeth April 28, 2006

From The Journal of Elizabeth

April 28, 2006

I leaned back on Amber's couch, perfectly at ease. She and Nathan sat on the chair with their arms and legs entwined.

“Hey, you guys can take the couch,” I said, standing. “I'm going to go out for a walk. It's too nice to sit inside.”

“Do you want us to come with you?” Nathan asked, making a move to stand too. I shook my head.

“No. How often do you guys get the chance for alone time?”

“How often do we use alone time to do things that couples do when their alone?” Amber pointed out. I shrugged my shoulders.

“You can come if you want,” I agreed. “But if not, I'll be back in like, thirty minutes tops.”

Nathan shifted in his spot, uncomfortably, I noticed. But, Amber seemed at ease where she was. I hadn't known Nathan long, but he seemed like the kind of guy who was a bit over protective – not that it was a bad thing.

“I'll be fine,” I told him. “No worries.” He faked a smile and watched me leave the room.

Amber lived right in the city. Pretty much everything was walking distance. I set my course for the Speedway a few blocks northwest. It was a short walk, only about ten minutes. I bought a pop and headed back toward Ambers, taking swigs as I went.

Suddenly, a voice called out to me.

“Elizabeth!”

The sound was familiar, but it sent shivers down my spine. I turned around, finding myself face to face with a boy I recognized, but I couldn't figure out where I knew him from.

His features were round, playing on the boyishness of his appearance. His baby blue eyes were cold though, unfeeling. He shifted his heavy set body to one side, then back to the other with a grin spreading across his crooked teeth.

“Do you remember me?” he asked, taking a step closer.

“Um. I'm not sure. Where do I know you from again?” I asked, moving back out of reach. I liked my personal space, and he was invading it.

“I'm Crissy's boyfriend, Rob, remember?”

I nodded as the one time we met clicked into my head. I hadn't liked him much then. He was too forward. Right now, he wasn't doing much to change that.

“So how old are you now? Its been a while.” He moved, once again, into my personal bubble.

“Thirteen,” I said timidly. “I'll be fourteen next month.”

“Damn,” he said. “I just turned nineteen last week. I always forget that you're under age.”

“Well...” I said, looking for words to say that would get me back to Ambers sooner, “I hang out with a lot of older people. Crissy's eighteen, Amber's seventeen. Nathan is eighteen.”

“Woah!” he said, grinning. “You've got older guy friends?”

“Yeah...” I looked for more words to continue with, but he cut me short.

“So, you must be somewhat experienced, right? I mean, all those older friends, you must have older kid experiences. Right?”

“I don't know what you're talking about,” I mumbled, trying to find an out to the conversation.

“Oh come on, sex, drugs, rock and roll.”

I shook my head. “No, I don't do stuff like that. Neither do my friends...” But he cut me off again.

“Ah. Come on. If you want to hang with the big kids, you've gotta act like the big kids. I'll show you.”

Before I could protest, he playfully lifted me up onto his shoulders like a sack of potatoes and headed back into the alley.

“I've gotta get back...” I said, trying to be assertive, while failing miserably to get my feet back on the ground, “Seriously, they're going to come looking for me.”

“Nah,” he shook his head. “I've got time.” Then, with the skill of an expert, he tore my shirt from my body. “You're so young, and ripe,” he grinned. “Much better than Crissy. You don't want to get old too fast. Your body starts to show it after a while.”

“No...please.” I cried, trying to cover myself from him. “I don't want to do this.”

“Sure you do,” he laughed, unbuttoning my jeans and slipping them down my thighs. “Otherwise, you wouldn't hang out with the big kids.”

“Please stop,” I nearly screamed, tears pouring from my eyes as I tried to get away from his tight grasp on my arms. “Please.”

“Beg me for it, and I'll be gentle. Beg me to let you go, and it will be much rougher,” he warned.

“...Please.” I begged again. “Please. No...”

“So, rough it is.” He grinned and brought his mouth to mine to drown out my scream.

When he was finished, he dressed and left without a word. I tried to stop the tears that rolled from my eyes as I got dressed but they kept coming. I put my clothes on as quickly as I could and nearly sprinted all the way back towards Ambers, hoping I didn't look too distraught.

“Elizabeth. We were just getting ready to look for you...” Amber said as I barged through the front door. I tried to hide my face as I made my way to the couch, mumbling excuses but Nathan moved forward for a closer inspection.

“What happened?” He demanded.

“Nothing...I tripped...and...I'm fine,” I managed.

“You're not fine. You have cuts...and bruises. Oh my god, are those fingerprint bruises on your arms?”

“No...I'm fine.” I said again.

“Bull crap your not,” he said angrily. “Amber, will you go get some ice...she's swelling.” Amber turned to go to the kitchen, with a look of panic on her face.

“Elizabeth,” he said, calmer this time. “What happened?”

I shook my head and the waterworks came again. I didn't want to talk about it, I wasn't going to talk about it. I cried harder, and my body shook. Nathan put his arms awkwardly around me.

“Shhh. Come on. You've gotta tell me what happened.”

“I cant...” I argued. “I cant talk about it.”

“Why not?” he soothed.

I shook my head.

“Here,” Amber said as she reentered the room. She had a bag of ice, some Tylenol and a glass of water. “Now, what happened?”

“I saw Chrissy's boyfriend....Rob...while I was walking...and...” I started crying harder again. “And he...did things...to me...”

“What did he do?” Nathan demanded softly. “What did he do to you Elizabeth?”

I shook my head, not wanting to go on.

“She's going to hate me after this...” I said instead.

“Elizabeth,” Amber said, realization hitting her, “Did he rape you?”

I nodded my head and immediately began to babble.

“I don't want anyone to know. I don't want her to hate me. I don't want to deal with all of this...please...just let it go. I'll get over it, I'll move on. I'll...I don't know what...just...please...let it go...i just...”

Nathan put his finger to my lips, and I started to cry again. I felt so pathetic, but the tears just wouldn't stop coming.

“First, this is not your fault,” he said. “Second, I am going to find that b*****d, and I'm going to cheerfully torture him to death.”

Amber wiped the tears from my cheeks, her blue eyes filled with such deep worry. “We have to tell someone,” she said. “We cant just let this go.”

“I don't want to do anything, or tell anyone. I just want to forget it...please?”

“I don't know...” She said.

Nathan stood up. “Well, I do! I'm not just going to sit around while this guy messes with her. I'm leaving.”

“Nathan, don't!” Amber said sternly. “It's not worth you going to jail.”

“To hell, its not. Of course it is! You don't do that...to anyone. Ever.”

“Nathan, you're going to go to jail...if you leave...” I said between the sobs, which were only coming harder. “I'm scared. What if he comes back?”

“Are you really just going to leave us here to go out and hunt down a creep who's not worth going to jail over?” Amber reasoned. “Stay here. Please.”

I watched as Nathans slim figure slumped in defeat. He sat down with the two of us, allowing me to cry freely onto his shoulder, and holding tightly to Ambers hand.

“I swear to God though. If I ever run into him, he better hope theres someone there big enough to hold me back.”

“Please, just stay here,” Amber said again.

He did. Fortunately for Rob.

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