King Oligarchus (Building Bubbles)

King Oligarchus charts the reign of a clever but unwise king who sees a way to restore wealth to his impoverished country by a questionable method.

Characters:

King Oligarchus Popularis

Lord Fortunatus

Prince Ochlocrates Popularis

King Meritocraseus

Chorus - Elders of Chotia

Democratos Honestus

Democratia Honestus

Democrisis Honestus

Merchant

Stonemason

Mammon

Moloch

King Kleptophilos

King Kakistoches

 

 

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(The Scene: King Oligarchus has just been crowned. Democracy, the country which he now reigns over, is indebted, and the populace are angry with the royal scandals associated with the court of the previous king, Pragmaticus, all but having forgotten his better qualities due to recent events related to corruption and to secret, private armies used to combat highwaymen with excessive force; they are celebrating his defeat in the war for the throne which recently took place, and are ever hopeful that the new king will be a noble, dashing knight who will save them from all evils and re-feather their nests.

The continent where Democracy is situated is slowly uniting in an unhappy political marriage of sorts under the auspices of the Empress Uniostasia, who is attempting to create a superstate to rival that of others on the planet. We find Democracy in the years just prior to Uniostasia's decision as to whether or not the kingdom will be included in the upcoming Europa Federation, and King Oligarchus wisely has plans for his country to be included as a strong ally, but unwisely - to achieve this by any fast-track economy stimulating means necessary.

The curtain is raised on the town square at one of the stalls where the Honestus matrimony are bartering a few chickens for some wheat, cheese and butter, and discussing their new king with the merchant, who is a friendly chap, in part due to character, and in part to hide the fact he weights his scales.)

 

Democratos:

Praise be to the gods, delivering us from the evil of Pragmaticus,

his kindness betrayed by his court and heavy-handed tactics,

so out with the old and never a thought, and let us rejoice at the new.

Praise be to the de novo king, Oligarchus, a brave man indeed,

he is a man of the people, he will see us all right,

the gods blessed him at birth, of that I am certain,

for one who has risen from attendant to king by virtue,

so short of phrase but strong of speech an honest king be,

and only those favoured by Zeus himself are so destined.

I heard from the blacksmith that the youthful Popularis,

and it is no lie, fought lions, and felled bears, by hand;

the baker told my dear wife as she bought our loaves,

Oligarchus fought battles a plenty, wars many more,

and never did he shy of the sword or flinch at rain of arrow,

and ever stood at the head of the marching troops,

a braver man there cannot be of mortal flesh.

I was told by the brewer he began as a tax collector,

wresting the crown's fair claim from all infractors,

never a one to need soldiers, he'd fight legions himself,

but then, the priest he did inform me, as I confessed last week,

that Oligarchus is a stubborn man, headstrong and a wily coot,

he even said that our new king is no better than the last,

and wolves in sheep's clothing will ever prey on our lands.

 

Democratia:

That is so my love, I was eavesdropping from the pew,

but I hold no faith in that man, he sins with the tailor's wife,

and I've seen him drunk as a lord before the Sunday mass begin.

I heard from the Elders that our king, grant him fortune, Athena,

is a wise and noble man, where others use force he employs wisdom,

it is a sage man who strikes when he must and unites when he so wills,

why, after losing the first war against Pragmaticus, turned tail he not,

he built up his strength, army, and forged allies, ready for the revenge, patient,

with the flames of Ares stoking his heart he returned determined,

no cowardly dog who turns tail with tail between legs,

Oligarchus proudly bade his time waiting for the moment,

and when the gods so ordained he struck with force,

he battled unwearyingly, our salvation willing him to victory.

A good man he is, not expedient in his ways at all,

he has formed strong ties with the three outlands,

extended his regal handshake to those barbarians,

taming their wild ways, out of love for one and all,

the Maciaoans, the Laubureans, and the Oscinians,

all are said to gain much from this harmonious union,

so now every Democratian forms a grand chain of unbreakable links,

one forged by the tempered hammer of good Oligarchus' word,

for I feel in my heart he means us well,

and when I saw the seer, she affirmed my intuition.

 

Merchant:

Seer or not, believe their quackery or not,

all's I know is that kings come and go,

none much for the better, many for the worse,

and much as I pray to the gods, I swear we are cursed,

looking at fact and not at bones cast for prophecy,

nor divining the clouds or the smoke burnt from offerings,

I could dare to say to ye in hushed tone that I've seen,

one a pilferer, the next a coward, after him a tyrant,

his son insane and even more cruel, the next an imbecile,

after him a bloodthirsty fool, next one manipulated by many,

another keener on life's pleasures and the damsels than on rule,

after him one who was so-so, could've been worse,

but after him came another thieving, egocentric fool,

so perhaps we'll be lucky and this time the gods wish us well,

but I have a little premonition that this one too will drag us down to another hell.

 

Democratia:

Why, merchant, shame on you, may Demeter cut out your tongue!

To speak so ill of blueblood certainly augurs trouble, Zeus forgive you,

and may he forgive my poor ears for having no choice but to hear if not heed.

Enough of your nonsense,I'll take my provisions, and you take these fowl,

be so good as to load my beloved with the sacks of wheat, filled, not short,

be assured I'll weigh them at home, we all know your game, wily weigher.

Come Democratos, you have work to do, as do I.

 

Democratos:

Here come the Elders of Chotia, wait my love - let them opine,

they'll know what to make of the new king,

and while they talk I can save my back from the weight of these sacks,

short on grain or not they be, more likely be than not, merchant.

(addressing the Elders)

Say, pardon our inquiring, reverend Elders of our hallowed town, Chotia.

Can ye spare a thought for us simple townsfolk, enlighten our mental burden,

be most gracious and share your wisdom of monarchs and of all things august,

and if you so will, reveal to us how your eyes and minds see Oligarchus?

 

Elders of Chotia:

Democratos, you ask a question complex and deep,

a matter over which the wisest lose much sleep,

for one man's sight is the blindness of the other,

since foe to thy sister may be friend of thy brother,

and judgements in haste hold little of weight,

changes cannot be seen when uttered that very day,

the footsteps of kings leave imprints eternal, oft times infernal,

some stamp hard, some skip gaily, and some tread firmly,

and the decree of yesterday isn't felt 'til the morrow,

while the joy of today can be the morn's deepest sorrow,

some spread salt on the fields claiming sowing of futures,

others sow long lasting seeds for their offspring to make use of,

the former cast webs and sprinkle gold dust to hide their sin,

the latter take the brunt of an empty field today to feed their future kin.

To judge a man on hearsay and scant firsthand experience,

is hardly a method we ourselves deem at all serious,

for tittletattle is the choice food of gluttonous, underfed minds,

and many spread false rumour and mischief with cunning designs,

many a tale has been told of a noble hero or some wicked villain,

in knowledge of how image can be the most damning of prisons,

or the ticket to get away with much that goes unnoticed,

so to take as gospel what we'll recount would be quite hopeless,

but as you so wish, we shall share what we have gleaned,

and what'smore, reveal what Pythia of Toledphos has prophecied.

 

Our land lies half-tattered from the excesses of old,

it is said the Crown Treasury has only dust and no gold,

Uniostasia is a hard ruler, for that she's an empress,

and ours is a time only just freed of distress,

strong allies we'll need, for the future bodes grim,

but if we go empty-handed Europa won't let us in.

 

Still, we are head above water, all things told,

we must thank our blessing the crown jewels weren't sold,

hate Pragmaticus as you will, he wasn't all bad,

in fact he did much to better our new found land,

our new king has much to do and many to feed,

only time will tell if he can truly succeed.

 

They say Oligarchus is a wily, canny man,

blessed of a brain worth that of two kings,

they say he truly has dreams for our blessed land,

and where's the will can be achieved great things,

they say he is tenacious, diligent, fair,

a pragmatic man with his feet on the ground,

a man fired with the energy and bravery of a bear

a king worth his weight in gold, pound for pound.

 

But it has been said his obstinacy is his Achilles' heel,

that his plans are a front for lining his pocket and his friend's,

he is prone to see good in cheap merchant wheel and deal,

and firmly believes the means can be justified by the ends.

It is claimed he cuts corners and cares not for consequences,

and that he worships Mammon and cares not for the old laws,

and once he is angered refuses to mend any broken fences,

is unable to admit he is wrong and has many more flaws.

 

To give him his due, he's a man of principle,

something oft lacking in the rulers of our times,

but another weakness is his thinking he's invincible,

to be admired is his frankness when speaking his mind,

not a one to do things by halves, he's a charismatic chap,

and uses his astuteness to win many a battle or friend,

when he so wishes he soon has them eating out of his hand,

all things considered, Oligarchus is a curious blend.

 

But to gossip and speculate today will tell us nothing of worth,

we must hold faith in this man to champion our country,

who will either turn out to be a cur or the salt of the earth,

we'll soon see his heart by who he keeps as close company,

and later we'll reap the benefits or pay yet another unjust price,

our hopes are that his feisty energy, acumen and strong will,

shall be the abundance of perfect ingredients to serve us just right,

he's a man who knows well all is grist that comes to the mill.

 

I hope we've answered your question, Democratos, and wife,

only the Oracle at Toledphos and the gods could truly tell,

our wish is for Oligarchus to have a rich and long life,

and to share the excess with us - a hope the merchant knows well,

Oligarchus has proven himself in battle, commerce and rhetoric alike,

is clearly brimming with substance and is not just some empty shell,

and may the benificent gods ensure he is mindful to only do what is right,

for the hopes we place on this man for ourselves and our country are truly heartfelt.

 

Democratia:

Why, most gracious Elders, I am none the wiser, nor my confused spouse by his face, and I know not why the merchant smirks so, but, I bid ye, pray tell - what was the Pythia's word on the matter?

 

Elders:

If our words you have not understood, the Pythia's will be an opaque crystal ball to you both too.

 

Democratia:

I beg ye, most humbly, I am an assiduous consulter of the seers of the town, and will surely better understand her words than yours, begging your pardon, may Demeter forgive my impudence too.

 

Elders:

We consulted the Pythia not two days ago, and for two goats offering we gave, in the name of Chotia and Apollo, this was her answer:

"The proud eagle, disciple of Mammon, will trade its nest egg for a speedy ticket to an unhappy wedding, then it will soar high through the skies on the sparrows' euphoria of castles built out of bubbles, caring not for the sparrows' morrow. The eagle will bring fleeting fortune to all, some much more than others, but know this, once it is long since flown away much more misfortune will its harvest reap than the one summer crop the sparrows will enjoy.

The proud eagle will be defeated by a dove, only to fly to warmer climes, but first it will be shot out of the sky by the angry thunderbolt of Zeus for the slaughter of babes in arms, veiled in a confabulated chimera, in the company of a rat and a slimy snake in search of black gold and dirty silver never to be shared, but not before the sparrows in its nest pay an unjust horror for the eagle's sin."

 

Merchant:

Just as I thought...

 

Democratia:

What did you think?

 

Merchant:

Nothing, nothing, just that. Maybe the Pythia is a wiser prophetess than I'd imagined her to be.

 

Democratos:

Well I for one understand even less now than before, no matter, the new king is sure to bring fortune to our doors and keep foreign enemies at bay.

 

Chorus of Elders:

Hope by Themis' good grace and vigilance your wish be made reality, Democratos, 'though hope is a weak bridge to traverse, prone to breaking when you least expect it to. Now, excuse us, we must bid ye good day, we are anxious to have an audience with this new monarch of ours and hear his thoughts on the future of our country.

 

* * *

(Scene: Crown Treasury, where the King is in a meeting with Fortunatus, Mammon, and his son, Ochlocrates, the three are planning a glorious future for them all. The Elders of Chotia are present as observers.)

 

King Oligarchus:

Check the treasure chest again, Fortunatus, I'll look under the floorboards with my son, here. Are you absolutely certain there is nothing but a spider spinning a web in there? Pragmaticus must have left something other than the Crown jewels.

 

Lord Fortunatus:

I lament to say, and most heartfelt indeed, that I have even checked between the cracks in the wood, underneath the chest itself, under the king's old bed, even in his chamberpot just in case, and there is nothing but an IOU it pains me to read out, dear friend.

 

Oligarchus:

Well? What does the note say? Tell us the worst and have done with it...!

 

Lord Fortunatus:

I quoth: "The kingdom you so craved is now gladly in your hands,

the coffers are beyond empty, be pleased to inherit my debts,

I used every last penny to care as best I could for this land,

you are now the proud owner of one terrible mess,

let's see how you dig your way out of Democracy's hole,

when the people have no work or money to be taxed on,

and as you see here there is not even a fleck of gold,

tell truth with such strife I'm relieved to be gone."

 

Oligarchus:

Why the arrogant fool, he mocks us with glee. We're going to need the services of an alchemist who isn't a fraud or a lunatic - so we can discount that option; or failing that, a band of highwaymen to rob every passing coach for an eternity just to clear the debt. The Usurer is a friend of your family, is he not, Fortunatus? Praise be to Zeus..., ask him to grant us a little time over some food and wine. The challenge ahead, I can eat that up before breakfast - I will fill the Crown Treasury and this chest before the year is out.

 

Prince Ochlocrates:

Father, pray tell, how deign you to tempt the Fates with such confidence? - It would seem our country is the fish biting its own tail, the problem has no end and no beginning to wrestle with.

 

Oligarchus:

Nonsense my boy, here there are three brave men, wise and strong, ...well, two men and a god, listen well and hear our shrewd brainstorming. Have some gumption about you, you'll never get anywhere with this defeatist attitude of yours, it comes from your mother's side; one day you may be king, so pay great heed to my teachings.

Fortunatus? Mammon? Suggestions? Let us see if we are of one mind on this little matter of creating wealth from nothing...

 

Fortunatus:

It would seem, dear friend, our urgent problems lie in the lack of people to tax, and the cost of your court and all the retinue therein. I hunt with the Usurer every Sabbath, and at my request he will bend his rules to our aid, but not without a price, I warn you, he is a harsh man.

Were we to invent a need for trade, it would trickle down and out to the whole population, and back into our pockets, and the Crown Treasury after; all we need to come up with is the foundation stone for our enterprise, ...castle building, for example. As king you make the rules, and the retinue will bitterly accept a cut in their luxury on threat of ejection from your court and even punishment, man is a craven pack animal, feeling safest cowing to the strongest who herds him.

 

Oligarchus:

See, boy - the fish has a head and a tail with which to grab it, and we'll be frying it for supper before the day is out. Excellent, my friend, our ideas converge, and I have no fear of the Usurer, let him set his terms and conditions, and we shall break them as it pleases us, if he dare to challenge me or betray me I'll get the Royal Tax Collector to look into his account books - no man will tell me what to do, not even if he has favoured my cause.

Castle building, you say...? We'd need roads to reach these castles, would we not? And more carriages to reach them by. And if we need more carriages we'll need more horses, animals ever in need of food, and more blacksmiths and saddle-makers to attend the maintenance of the beasts and therefore the endless purchases of their riders. What is more, these roads will need wayside taverns and inns to provide victuals and wine to tired travellers and messengers. I hazard a guess that not only will the innkeeper benefit, as will the stonemasons who build the things, the tradesmen and carriage drivers who pass through will need the services of the wenches upstairs, who will also benefit financially - they'll be able to buy pretty frocks and rouge, and whatever their hearts desire, so the tailor and seamstress, and perfumer, shall also do more trade, and will need to pay us taxes.

And we could help matters by placing gates at multiple points on these roads to take a toll for their upkeep. All these people with newfound occupations and taxable wealth will need more merchants to attend them, who will also be in need of paying taxes to us. And surely they will wish to move from their hovels to a stone house, creating yet more need for the stonemasons' trade, and will wish to furbish the homes in their likeness, providing trade for craftsmen, who will need to buy the materials for their art, so they will also need to pay the realm on their profit and on the materials. And that is just to begin with.

 

Fortunatus:

As ever my friend, great minds think alike. A ball in motion downhill gathers speed and collects all in its path to grow bigger and bigger. We can set to work immediately. I have a further suggestion: Are we really in need of all these silly Crown jewels, taking up space and costing us the expense of their guarding? I have yet to see the king who wears more than the crown, ruby-studded gold chain, the rings, and holds the sceptre from time to time. What use the rest? And who would know? We could dispense with the guard here and set them to manning the tolls instead.

 

Oligarchus:

Brilliant, my friend, tradition costs us more than it is worth, and those ugly trinkets are worth melting down to the highest bidder, and if not then as a favour to our allies and friends at a discount, so long as they give us a cut. But we must move stealthily in this act, for there would be an outcry were we to do so now, first let's line the public's pockets with silver, and when they are drowsily content, let it slip some sunny day, gilding the pill is a fine art of choosing the right moment to break unwelcome news.

 

Mammon:

I laud your business acumen, noble sires, your astute wheeling and dealing will serve you both very well, and the public, so long as you and your friend the Usurer so wish them to. Mentioning said man - Would it not be wise for the Usurer to offer loans to the public just when their pockets are full, business booming, and their hearts brimming with confidence and enthusiasm for the 'morrow? I ask as you seem to have overlooked the opportunity to create even more gold from thin air at no risk to yourselves... Caveat emptor is for kings, not plebs. What is more, were you to pledge all that the public buy with their loans as security for your debts to the Usurer when they can no longer keep up the re-payments, I am sure he will see a bargain hard to refuse, he'll double his money, after all; it is an ideal situation, beneficial to all concerned: you win, he wins, ...and the public lose everything eventually but that is of no import.

...Read the rest of the play here, along with the others in the trilogy.

Mammones Popularis Cycle:

King Oligarchus (Building Bubbles)

Don Vitoecles Belticus (Honour Among Thieves)

King Ochlocrates (No Man Can Serve Two Masters)

Author's Note

The story is an emulation of a Greek Tragedy, but based on the last fifteen years or so of politics in a European country, and it has been researched before writing. My goal was to parody Greek Tragedy, but lovingly, and to fit a corrupt government's actions into the classical structure of dialogue and poems, not easy.

Reviews

[Cryingkate]

I am working on this . It will take some time but loving it. Awesome ! so far