Half Steps

 

Dancing alone, to and fro, between the notes

I find your name spelled out in intervals.

Swaying to the ballad of my bewildered soul,

half steps guide my feet,

lightly tapping the floor;

highs and lows balance consecutive beats,

directing the lyrical drummer of my weary heart.

 

Augmented melody plays a major role,

repeatedly performing through life;

minor notes anticipated.   

Tunes diminish; 

taking a bow in an empty auditorium,  

lonely is my curtain call.

 

Backstage octaves resume,

singing in shadowed spaces;

tugging flat feet toward its seductive melody, 

inverted steps no longer dance on a chromatic scale 

but sharply ascend into wholeness,

where I find you.

 

Author's Note

Prose -- in progress :) This will likely be repeatedly edited. Ideas and opinions welcomed. Thanks.

Reviews

[PENS FOR PEACE /TJ CALI..]

You're poetry is pure music to one's heart!
It is truly beautiful and very brilliant to say the least!
One's sense of your loneiness in this terrific poem is so sad, but through your despair one finds hope in the end that you will find what you are searching for in this life and that you will find true happiness in your lifetime!
A very well thought and brillantly done poem again well written from within your soul!
Bravo! Like always, very well artisticly done and I loved it!
Good things always come to those who patiently wait in life and it will for you my dear!
Keep making this world a more beautiful place with your marvelous poetry!
Keep writing from deep within your soul for the good of all souls!
Always,
TIM

[Justin Tobey]

Amazing combination of metaphor and musical terminology. :) Love this.

[darkgurl]

This is so wonderful, and so beautiful, so well written ovr all I guess you could say top notch write....Kim

[Clockwork]

I really like the idea of love as a dance. Your descriptions were spot on, and very beautiful. I look forward to reading this piece as it grows.

[Angela]

Hey Dani, I like it very much. It's not finished? It sure sounds great, but if it is a prose in progress, then I guess you probably have a little fine tuning you want to do to it. Either way, it flows very well. I especially like the part:

"Swaying to the ballad of my bewildered soul,
half steps guide my feet"

Good work!!

[JRB]

it was a great write i enjoyed the read, flow was right on, thoughts as well,
Jan/uisiom

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Beautiful

[angelina neves]

wonderful dance! Lovely tune!

[Dionysus Cain]

sounds good so far, the lonliness is pure here. i enjoyed this, sometimes it is better to be alone and want. rather than try and get hurt.

[Cardinal Robin]

Half steps, majors and minors, solitude in soliloquy
Wherein does the dancer find her music instantly
And wholeness ascending from the fall that none can hear
In the essence of you finds all songs dancing in you clear
beyond transcendance and trying and the welcoming of your voice
Heard at least by those of us who read between your lines, manifested eloquently.

Bravo!
Robin

[Wildfleour]

I will wait until you feel it's complete to comment fully. But let me just say, I'm already liking it, especially the last few lines.

If it's going to be Prose, it needs to read like a story, not a poem.