I Wait

For Albert's Poetry Cafe "Keeping the Dream Alive" LONELINESS contest

 

 

  

 

Words of yore,

drift by,

I glance. 

 

Years gone by,

love lost,

I own.

 

Time well spent,

fades off,

I spin.  

 

Days on end,

no sound,

I wait.

Author's Note

This was not a form contest, however I devised my own simple
pattern for this piece as follows:

Four stanzas
No rhyme

3/1-1-1
2/1-1
2/1-1

Reviews

[Spoken]

This to me represents living with a mistake or regret and waiting.. for wait? Perhaps to redeem, to fix, or to find happiness again. I particularly like the 2nd and 4th stanza. They just jump out at me. It's never easy to tell a story with few words and I enjoy reading the work of those who are able to pull it off... (this is where i point my finger in your direction)

[Sharon Miller Bolander]

I liked the pattern you used. It seemed to capture the sense of loneliness much better than most longer, wordier forms would be able to do. We can allow too much of life to slip on by needlessly if we succumb to feeling isolated. Good job on this themed challenge, Dani. Sharon

[D. Nelson]

great writer, Danielle. you managed to fully convey the sort of empty feeling that comes with lonliness in very few words

[angelinmypocket]

It's so sad to be alone when all one has for company are memories of a lost love.
That is the epitome of lonliness...remembering what once was but is no more.
So much said here in so few words Dani...a wonderful write.
Love/Liz/angelinmypocket