I Wait

For Albert's Poetry Cafe "Keeping the Dream Alive" LONELINESS contest

 

 

  

 

Words of yore,

drift by,

I glance. 

 

Years gone by,

love lost,

I own.

 

Time well spent,

fades off,

I spin.  

 

Days on end,

no sound,

I wait.

Author's Note

This was not a form contest, however I devised my own simple
pattern for this piece as follows:

Four stanzas
No rhyme

3/1-1-1
2/1-1
2/1-1

Reviews

[Spoken]

This to me represents living with a mistake or regret and waiting.. for wait? Perhaps to redeem, to fix, or to find happiness again. I particularly like the 2nd and 4th stanza. They just jump out at me. It's never easy to tell a story with few words and I enjoy reading the work of those who are able to pull it off... (this is where i point my finger in your direction)

[Angelic Darkness]

This poem reminds me of control, yet someone that loses it as time goes on.

AD

[Aspiring Angel]

Beautiful form upon the page with so much being said in so few words. Loved this one.

Blessings,
Lesa

[JadedSparrow]

You have a beautiful gift my friend. Truly a master of our art...

[Valentine]

Glance, own, spin, and wait.. Sounds like me when I think of what could have been in my life and isn't..so I dream....God bless..Valentine

[Dalaina Renee]

I hate to waite! Good poem!

[[untitled]]

Alot said in few words. I think this is a great piece. Well-written. Nice flow.

[Michael X]

Dani, this poem, in all its simplicity is truly one of your best poems, imo.
well written within ease, your form captured a lighthearted design,
the words float through the heart. and that being the 1 syllable wording.

[Angel's Lady]

Melancholy...forlorn...*sigh*....

Good job. Good luck!

[Helena]

This was superb Dani. A well structure poem that captures loneliness so well.

Good job!

Thank you for Keeping the Dream Alive! ~ Helena :)

[Tovli]

loved the form-consise and open to capture the most complex emotions and speak of them with the simplest language. nicely done. tovli