Just a Dream

 

Can you hear me

As I whisper your name?

Across the ocean

It travels in vain.

 

Can you see me

As I stretch out my hand?

Across the miles

To a distant land.

 

Can you feel me

As I caress your cheek?

Across my mind

It’s you that I seek.

 

Can you love me

As I draw you near?           

Or was it just a dream?

You were never really here.

 

 

 

Reviews

[Adrian K. Smith]

I think the fourth stanza poses the most intriguing question, in the sense that the Love itself is what may have been the dream - while the rest - was reality. Yes, I know I tend to charge out to left field sometimes; but you could be standing right next to the person and wonder if the emotions were a dream...

[Edmond Dantes]

oh, a little longing for someone stateside to come visit ohau huh? haha. no. it's very nice write.
"Or was it just a dream?
You were never really here."

I don't where or what this reminds me of--a song or a poem perhaps, You were never really there-
Was it freud or Plato that said love is insanity.

[[untitled]]

Your rare and beautiful talent never ceases to amaze me, sweet friend. This poem is sublime.

Gentle imagery that flows with the imagination.

[Ralphy]

Oh Dani, How poetic and sweet this loving poem is. You do have a sense of style and grace when you write these types of poems. Your the emotion and passion just pour out in a very unique way. Nice poem.

[Renee Zepeda]

I liked your poem a lot. Good job.

[Natasha Ashway]

Perhaps 50% of my opinion could be discounted because I'm so highly strung right now anything will move me to tears, yet this is lovely! I feel these words completely, wishing my love was here with me et al, and your words are perfect.
Thank you for sharing this. Nice read.

[None]

As I read your tender words they make a painting in my mind. Very vivid and touching!

[Catrinka]

this piece captures the longing of love, the way it can capture your imagination but not quite fulfill it (at least that's what it said to me) Great job Dani! I could hear the voice across the ocean :-)

[Omar]

wow
this perfectly talks about the part of my life last year, towards the end of my relationship with someone. that person was "never really there."
this is going into my f-a-v-o-r-i-t-e-s
great job.

O

[fireblossom]

You have a lovers heart. My guess is that others have not always rewarded you for your sincerity :-( :-)

This poem is gentle and at the same time compelling. This is the poem of a lovers heart in the position of safety corresponding with the focus of affection. Like the famous love letters of past poets and writers found in a drawer after their passing this poem is open and as it says "drawing".

Another well written poem from a sweet heart.

[Angela]

I think this is a truly inspired piece. It speaks volumes and allows the reader to have a peek into your soul.

"Can you hear me
As I whisper your name?
Across the ocean
It travels in vain."

"Can you see me
As I stretch out my hand?
Across the miles
To a distant land."


I can relate to these stanzas. Ahhh...love, yearnings. This is a very intense poem, Dani. Makes me wonder.
You are an awesome writer. Thanks for sharing this.