Watercolors

Watercolors

A Poem by Dani California

 

  

Watercolors

Run carelessly off of your canvas

Onto the floor

Creating a slippery surface

Where others may fall.

 

Blind

To what lies beneath their feet

Following only your words

Through an array of tainted colors

To the pictures you’ve painted.

 

Victim

Is the signature you’ve scribbled

Depicted on all of your paintings

Though each held a different portrait

The same final outcome is displayed.

 

Deceit

Is what hangs in your gallery

Your fans huddled around in denial

Seemingly oblivious to the similarities

The same strokes, repeated. 

 

Liar 

Is what you’ve named them

Throwing spilled paint over truth

Leaving others to soil their shoes

In the mess you’ve created.

 

 

 

 

© 2010 Dani California


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

I like this and I like the way you've used colors to express the idea of a painting. The poem itself is painfully true of someone I know, but far better worded than I could have done! I think I like this stanza best, although the whole poem resonates deeply.

Victim
Is the signature you've scribbled
Depicted on all of your paintings
Though each held a different portrait
The same final outcome is displayed.

Great job, as usual!


Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

You wrote this so well. Your heart really came through in this piece. A kindness and calmness. The presentation is fantastic.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Oh, what a dreadful web we weave when first we practice to deceive. Nicely done, Dani. Great write, too!

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I agree with what everyone has said, my friend. You evoke strong images of this person through the metaphor of colors. Watercolor, no less. It washes away with the rain and then nothing is left.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Wow, Dani! First of all the colors just pulls you in to this beautiful heartfelt poem. You took me to the many phases to describe the effects it had on you ... Wonderfully written. Beautiful presentation! hugs

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Girl....this is phenomenal! I'd have probably said it a bit harsher, but this....whew!! You got it, right on. Perfect message of deceit and betrayal neatly packaged in the lovely paintings we hang on our wall. Could be our own deceit, or that of another. Wonderful write. And I love how you started each stanza out with one word...very powerful. It gives the reader a glimpse of what is to come. Love it!

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I absolutely love the meaning you convey using watercolors...I love your voice in this poem because your tone is not bitter it is more empathetic for the person you write about...your words resonate because at one time or another in life we have met the person you describe which you offer a very benevolent and compassionate tone for the others which will be effected by this person...this poem definitely has the ability to speak to the reader...WOW!

how you present the poem is very innovative and adds to the poem's value...beginning each stanza with a word ('watercolors', 'blind', 'victim', 'deceit', 'liar')...using different colors for each stanza....LOVE IT!

"Leaving others to soil their shoes
In the mess you've created."
...your last lines are absolutely amazing...I love how you think...I don't think that sentiment could be put any better...your focus is impeccable.

WONDERFUL JOB ON THIS POEM...VERY WELL WRITTEN...THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS ONE!


Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Firstly, the colours add to the different facets of the man's character and how you feel about them..

Secondly, you've used words quite economically, not over-dramatically, just straight and honest phrases:

Liar
Is what you've named them
Throwing spilled paint over truth
Leaving others to soil their shoes
In the mess you've created.

Think this is an inguous post in both layout and content. Thank you for sharing, Dani




Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

What a unique description of how we paint distorted pictures of ourselves on the canvas of Life.

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This poem to me says of a man who had a lot of lovers, and fed them all
the same line, just to paint his own colors upon their souls.

Lovely piece...AD

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Oh, I love this. A lot of people paint themselves as victims to get sympathy or attention, never thinking about the problems or trouble they are creating for others with the mess they have created as you so aptly put it. They can paint some pretty pictures to, but as you said the paint soon begins to leak onto the floor and the lie's are uncovered. Although there are some who are blind to what is going on and would believe black is white if certain people told them it was.

I love this Dani. I also love the many colors that depict different lies or stories but in the end coming out the same.
This goes to my fav's

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1132 Views
37 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 3 Libraries
Added on August 16, 2008
Last Updated on April 11, 2010

Author

Dani California
Dani California

CA



About
A Noiseless Patient Spiderby Walt Whitman A noiseless patient spider, I mark'd where on a little promontory it stood isolated, Mark'd how to explore the vacant vast surrounding, It launch'd fort.. more..

Writing

Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..