Cold

Thoughts racing in my head again begging to be let out.

I'm Freezing
I'm Frozen
I'm Numb
Right down to my very soul
Hell is not hot
It's cold
Worst then the coldest winter
On the darkest night
Chilling my bones
As if from fright
I am dead
My blood turned to ice
I tried to warn them
I did so even twice
All they said was nice
Feelings are gone
The pain is a badge torn
Time inches like a worm
Traveling through a winter storm
In the end my frozen touch will only burn

Author's Note

Review, Rate, Comment

Reviews

[deadly healer]

I could feel so much emotion. your way of writing is different. i enjoyed this poem although it made me cold.

[Doreen]

Again, I urge you to use punctuation in your poetry. It will bring out the the feelings of anger and sorrow, the passion of the write. Nice. I like this piece.

[jeff hackworth]

very deep

[deeps]

This is kind of deeo and powerful I realy enjoyed this write.

[Charles]

Good poem for the picture and a deep, penetrating cold it is that you paint. I guess the concept (closing line) of a frozen touch burning is an acceptable one, given poetic license and the contrast you're trying to establish, but I wonder about an earlier dichotomy: feelings are gone followed by pain is a badge - it seems to me that there'd be no pain if feelings are gone... just a thought. Even earlier I think the better comparative term would be worse than, not worst then (note the e-t in worst and a-e changes in then). I'm chilly just thinking about this poem. :-)

[Khaotic Katastrophe]

the flow is great so is the imagery. very nice work here

[Jennika has a short att..]

Amazing write dude. The imagery is awesome and now I sound like a robot repeating everyone and telling you what you want to here. Uh, I love the picture :D No one's commented on that. Seriously dude, keep up the good work.

[James Watts]

I liked the flow and loved the imagery. Very nice write.

[TheAdventOf]

I definitely dig the rhyme scheme, but I feel like it might be deterring the flow of the poem a little bit. I love the imagery, and I love the point you're trying to get across, without a doubt, but if it's not flowing right out of your mind rhyming, then maybe it's not supposed to. Keep it up though, loving what I'm seeing so far!