Broken

I wrote this about my three year old son who has a tumor on his brain. He goes into surgery to remove it in the morning.

Her Diamonds - Rob Thomas

Here I sit brokenhearted
Praying that my son
Does not become one of the departed

I will never forget how it all started
Three years ago
He began capturing hearts

Through birth pains he came in
Unknown to us his brain altered its image
But hid its true intentions

Now he is asleep
Deep in a dream
Of Thomas the choo choo train and chocolate ice cream

I fear the worst
But pray for the best
This is truly my greatest test

He is my first born
Him I truly adore
So I cry on the floor

I must be strong
I must remain calm

His last words before they put him to sleep
Play over and over like a heartbeat
"Daddy you make me feel better."
"Yes my son," as I kiss him on the cheek

Author's Note

Please review and rate. I do not care about the grammar one bit. All those who do I will update on his status tomorrow after his surgery. Thank you all in advance for reading.

Reviews

[Shalini Dinesh]

I could feel the depression within you as a parent, i pray to god that your son gets well soon, the poem is so heartfelt and i wasn't able to read it like a poem rather it was like reading your heart... don't worry , have faith and trust in God!...

[Coyote Poetry]

First I will put your son in my prayers. Our children are our purpose as soon as we hold them in our arms. I could feel the sadness and hope is in your words. A beautiful poem for someone very important.
Coyote

[zachary<]

much peace.
much love.

[James Watts]

As a father I can just imagine what you are going through. I pray that everything goes well. This touched me in away no other piece on this site has. My prayers are with your son and family on this night and all through this ordeal. God bless you all, dear friend.

[Jenny Nelson]

I will be praying for your son tonight and tomorrow. My heart goes out to you and your family. You've written a beautiful, heartfelt, honest piece. It is amazing what doctors can do nowadays. Keep the faith and hang in there.

[LisetteCanWrite!]

Very touching writing.. this is so sad to read for one so young to have to go through. I loved the strength and emotion you portrayed here for him. I hope and pray his surgery is a successful one. I can not imagine what you are feeling but as a parent my heart goes out to this.. as it really would be the ultimate test for any parent. Best wishes and the warmest prayers to your son as well as your whole family..

[Charles]

Well, you've started on the right track here. a poem is first of all a thing of the heart (or maybe the imagination). This effort is clearly heartfelt and has some other things going for it, like continuity of theme, a rhyming scheme that is irregular (but not at all weak), and crisp (and logical) stanza breaks. Keep up the fine work and such things as grammar and metaphor (imagery) will follow. Hope your son does fine and is soon awake in your arms.