How Could It Be?

How could it be, that I lose my son
To a drug deal gone bad?
How could I not see the signs,
The changes in his attitude?
How could it be?

He use to be a straight A-student,
Then he started slacking off;
I thought all boys his age did that,
But I was wrong

I thought his sudden 'hunger attacks'
Were a part of him growing
And becoming a man,
But I was wrong about that too

How could I be so stupid, and naive?
How did I not realize this?

I'm such a horrible mother!

I hate myself!

I'm the one that drove him to this!

How could I let this happen
To my one and only son?
How did he get addicted
To that disgusting drug
When he was only 16?

Maybe if I were more involved in his life
Instead of wrapped up in my own,
He would still be alive

I just can't comprehend... How could this be....?

Author's Note

This prompt was a mothers regret for her sons death.

Reviews

[Cynthia]

I like it a lot, the pain in this poem, the regrets in this poem, just a lot of emotions. It hurts when a mom lost her son she love, once proud of, but now lost cause of a drug deal. it hurts, but it isn't all his mom's fault, the child need to take responsibility to his actions, what he decided to do. A heart breaking poem.
Nice Written!

[Kala Benfield]

this is really sweet, very touching.. and impacting. Very nice.. i liked it alot.
Keeo it up
-kala

[Poetic Beauty]

This is a very heartbreaking poem and i can see a mother thinking these thought day after day trying to figure out what went wrong. You wrote this poem well for the prompt.

[Blue Moon Ice Cream]

Painful but descriptive look inside a mother's head...what ifs, always what ifs. A person can't even imagine how much their behavior could end up hurting the people they love most...

[Letemdangle]

I was expecting something quick and sweet from you. I got a surprise. Unfortunately, this poem is written on too many hearts.

[CagedBIRDsings]

Emotional and full of past regrets and pain. It brought tears to my eyes. A heatbreaking poem and an amazing job. Thank you.

[A.E. Surdam]

Very nice, yet sad. Whenever I have a child, I would hate to see him or her in pain or doing drugs or alcohol. This poem is very well written and emotional.

[brenda]

this is such a sad poem poor mom !!:( i love the poem it shows emoution behind every word!

[*[[ Cadence ]]*]

so sad.. but well written. u can really feel the emotions. nicely done!

[Murisaka]

touching and sad all in the same swift movment. Regret for a son and a choice, but who knows if life would be different, or how different it would become even after changing a choice, to spending more time, and hoping his life would be better off because of it. Ive personally been with the leaf, dealt with a couple of my friends doing it. for some the break of the addiction is realitivly easy, for the mass majority who do the drugs, well, thats a different story, that you have written beautifully.

[Neva Flores Smith - Cha..]

Excellent depiction of the guilt a parent is racked with after the senseless death of a child. Well done!