September

September

A Poem by Dakota
"

For Jake April 1982-September 2006

"

We Still laugh about it

Now and then
All the good times we remember
Telling old stories
Playing your songs
But we never bring up September

 

Sometimes it's hard
To just ignore the shouts
And the horrid things people say
But I remember how
You used to just smile
Saying "It's their American way."


And no matter how bad
It got for you over there
Nothing ever got you down

We tried so hard to cling
To that attitude of yours
The day we laid you in the ground


Most will never really know
Just how much it takes
To protect their freedoms to live
Strangers pay that share
And more sometimes
Giving all that is in them to give


So we'll gather again
And toast a round
Praying your memory will always linger
We'll tell all your old stories
And play your old songs
But we'll never mention September

© 2010 Dakota


Author's Note

Dakota
This is my first poem EVER so I'm sure there's a lot wrong with it. LOL

My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Reviews

Oh my gosh. This really touched me. Wow, definitely a good poem.

Posted 13 Years Ago


this captured poem captured the notion of "brother/sisterhood" for me

Posted 13 Years Ago


I am sorry for yur loss....but grieve not....its a celebration...to be alive again.

Posted 13 Years Ago


There isn't a damn thing wrong with this. It nearly made me cry. I'm going to have my wife read it too.
I know the person this is about must be in a better place.
Thanks for sharing.

.novelists.elite.info.
.display. .jake.008.
.memberID. 008
.division. I
.division.leader. Wesley
.name. Jake
.username. DesertKing

.novels. Cliff, Night Breed, Journey of the Kervant, Back To The Shack, The Cult, The Purple Rift

.status. Role Model, Novelist, noelwrimo Champion

.noelwrimo.wordcount. 30,271
.join date. 03-24-2011

Posted 13 Years Ago


0 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Very sad but like group therapy it is a good thing to write of pain

Posted 13 Years Ago


Hi Dakota,

"...a lot wrong with it...", well not so much. This is a good poem. For a first poem I think you grasp the medium quite well. And your story and words set the mood wonderfully. With that mysterious "September" lurking out there and the death and all, the reader wonders exactly what to think. A million possibilities play with the mind. And you make the deep melancholy and emptiness felt after his passing quite apparent.

This is a nice work that I enjoyed reading. Write more poems. I think you can get very good at it.

Very best regards,

Rick

Posted 13 Years Ago


I really like it. Sad but very good. I can't believe it's your first poem! Congrats

Posted 13 Years Ago


This is really great sad but really great

Posted 13 Years Ago


I actually think you did quite well writing this piece. I enjoyed your style of writing in this, and you got your emotion to flow, so good job on your part! :)

Posted 13 Years Ago


I am in complete agreement with Amy Bumpas, those lines are good.

Posted 13 Years Ago



Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

1644 Views
37 Reviews
Rating
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on June 6, 2010
Last Updated on June 8, 2010

Author

Dakota
Dakota

KS



About
I'm a thirty year old mother of eight homeschool wildlings (ages 14-3), and the wife of a Marine grunt I met the way one usually meets grunts: at our first duty station. I don't write like a girl, .. more..

Writing
Prologue Prologue

A Chapter by Dakota


Blue Falcon Blue Falcon

A Book by Dakota


Blue Falcon- 1 Blue Falcon- 1

A Chapter by Dakota



Related Writing

People who liked this story also liked..


Pillar Pillar

A Chapter by MuSe Ampoule