Moonstone Earring Triangle

The engaging southern light

above winter’s rip,

fiberglass clouds

hardened with ice

 

Chimney smoke,

lighter than December’s gray. 

Moonstone Beach,

waves peeling like wallpaper

 

Assuring myself

it’s not thundering,

I look for lightning,

only to hear the sea’s tuba

 

I watch sunrise setting fire

to foggy scenes,

wet sand sucks my feet.

A lone earring, buried

beneath the breakers

 

A woman, yogi, forms Triangle.

Covered in mist, she blends 

human with ocean with shells.

Straight up, her left arm

gathers moisture

 

The woman moves into Mountain

fingers plugged into blue,  

her eyes, fixed with solar beams,

remembering …

==============================

from my unpublished manuscript:

Straightforward, No Chaser

first published in Oyster River Pages

Author's Note

This was written at Moonstone Beach,
south of Big Sur on Highway 1

The foto is of McClures Beach
©dah / dahlusion 2018

Reviews

[Willoby]

WOW! 'waves peeling like wallpaper' and 'I look for lightning, only to hear the sea’s tuba' are my favorite. I am transported in these words, to a beautiful overcast beach filled with mysticism in a mist of gray and blue. Thank you, DAH,
Willoby

[DAH]

Thank you, Willoby, for this fine critique!
Now I'm saying WOW!

Cheers,
DAH

[Coyote Poetry]

I love how you use the description. Allowing the reader to see and feel your words.
"Chimney smoke,
lighter than December’s gray.
Moonstone Beach,
waves peeling like wallpaper"
I love the above lines. Thank you for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[DAH]

Thank you, CP!

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[John Alexander McFadyen]

A lone man walking on a morning beach with the ocean sounds in his ears spies a lone woman practicing her yoga on the sands. A morning cameo as he is transfixed with her moves. Such wonderfully colourful descriptions with sound and smell and the tactility of moisture written upon the page.

[DAH]

Excellent, John, thank you!

[barleygirl]

Your poem is the poster child for what I harp on in reviews: (1) find fresh sparkling ways to present relatable ideas . . . and (2) sprinkle in some unusual words, explore words & play with them. This is the kind of phrasing every writer wishes he/she wrote: "waves peeling like wallpaper" . . . "sea’s tuba" . . . "blends human with ocean with shells." Always love your writing! So glad Bad Bunny pointed you out to me! (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[DAH]

Happy to read that my poem stimulates you into writing such a fine critique, Margie, and thank you for this encouragement.

Cheers,
DAH

[gram linski]

an evocative poem tinted in early sunlight on cold winter days , yoga on the beach, she blends human with Ocean with shells, perfect,

[DAH]

Thank you, gram!

I'm happy to read the quote, too.

Cheers,
DAH

[R.E. Ray]

More than a seascape and certainly not a portrait, but a masterful poem. If you could paint and frame this image, sir... I was watching with you, catching a bit of that ocean mist on my sunglasses.

[DAH]

Sir R.E.

I'm happy that this one put you there.
Yes, the mist on the sunglasses ...

Thank you for this fine critique!

Cheers,
DAH

[Lorry]

This really does have a "picture the scene" vibe, that imprints on our mind with each passing line. It leaves us contemplating the thoughts of the yogi mirroring your observations of the surrounding nature, as she does her thing, oblivious to you doing yours.
I really like this. I'm still thinking of what's going on, after the words have ended.

[DAH]

I'm honored by this wonderful critique.

Thank you, Lorry!

DAH

[NotUsinganymore]

Very nice descriptive poem. I enjoyed it a lot. c:

[DAH]

Thank you, JungLee!

[emmajoy]

Not a place I knew or probably ever will.... sez she mini blinks apart.. yet do now after that extraordinary flow of words.
Seems from a hushed chill you slowly slide into amazing warmth. I smiled, said a silent 'ahh - how ncredibly visual: ' I watch sunrise setting fire - to foggy scenes, - wet sand sucks my feet. - A lone earring, buried - beneath the breakers '

Wondering if the earring is history's 'dropped
handkerchief - an intentional lure or, something that really was an accidental loss. (Rushed my previous review, edited now, escuse, please)

[DAH]

This is a lovely critique, emmajoy, thank you! And I wondered about the erring, too.

Cheers,
DAH

[An owl on the moon]

How this scene unfolds with such a gentle beauty. I can feel the chill of the mist, hear the song of the waves, see the movement coming to life on the sand. It has been a long time since I visited Hearst Castle... just north of Moonstone Beach... but everything there is glorious.

[DAH]

Aootm, I happy to read that this piece has moved you to write this heartfelt critique, and that you've visited the area. Yes, it is glorious ...

Cheers,
DAH

[Karmee]

Assuring myself
it’s not thundering,
I look for lightning,
only to hear the sea’s tuba

I really like this part and the imagery in this write, very nicely written and expressed

[DAH]

Thank you, Korin, for the quote, and for feeling this write.

Cheers,
DAH