Cleansing

I wrote this shortly after cleaning my room and letting my mind wonder far and long.

Cleaning my room, I'll start with the blankets that were thrown on the shag floor about a week ago. Then I'll move on to all the various pieces of paper that are strewn all over the place. Next I go on to laundry all the dirty in one pile and the clean go into the navy blue laundry basket in front of my wooden dresser we found at a yard sell years ago. I picked up a pile of clothes, a striped tank top, a small white beach dress and a sleeved American Eagle shirt. As I removed them from there place on the floor a light shower of sand trickled to the ground. I shook them clean and threw them in the dirty pile. I picked up a square black bag and my small purple bag I sewed last summer. I tipped them upside down over the trashcan, sand poured from the pockets, and then I hung them on the hook where they belong. My favorite black stilettos I bought for our girl's Valentines dinner two years ago were on the floor next to the door. I picked them up and gently brushed off the sand that hid inside the crevices and clung to the smooth black surfaces. After tucking them into the square white cubby where they belong, I moved on to the bookshelf. If you could call it a bookshelf, it’s a long piece of wood I painted ocean blue and propped up with two concrete bricks I found in the yard. I scooped up a pile of shells and put them in a small bowl with all the other one's I've stolen from this island's endless beaches. I strolled around the room collecting all the bikini bottoms and tops that hung from chairs, drawers, windowsills and doorknobs. Together they created a swirl of bright fabric and elastic in the light wicker basket that sat near the window. I looked out side. The wind was violently shaking the lychee trees, the grass and the laundry on the clothesline all swayed to the same beat. The blue skies behind them seem to be happy, encouraging. My mind wandered away, dreaming of things I've always wanted to do. Walk the streets of Italy admiring the architectural beauty hidden throughout the world, Ice skate on a small frozen pond in the morning light, watch Swan Lake be performed my the American Ballet Theater just to be left in awe. What do you want to do? It's all anyone asks me now, eager for me to have my entire future planned out. "What do I want to do? I want to live."