The Plan

     I mentioned before that I am selfish and soulless, but I take that back partly. I have a plan to help the weaklings of this world. I will teach them to be like me. Everyone will have to fend for themselves, just like I do. I already know what you're thinking. 'Emily, you're probably only doing this because you're depressed about the way your family ignored you as a child,' well you're wrong. I'm doing this to teach people that they'd live a lot longer and happier life if they didn't try to help every dead bird on the road. You could say I have a kind bone in my body. I guess I do, but it's probably just a phalange.

     You're probably also thinking I'm too young to make any sort of difference, well you'd be wrong again. See what I mean when I call you guys simpletons? First of all, I never even mentioned doing this as an eight year old. Second, so what if I'm eight? That doesn't mean I can't do it. As they say, age is just a number. The number of times I have been on this planet for it to revolve around the sun doesn't matter. In fact, being young is even more of an advantage. Like I said, I can use someone, abandon them, and remain completely remorseless. I can manipulate adults and make them feel bad for me. I'd make a pretty good lawyer. I get anything I want from whoever I want. That is, besides my parents. They know me a bit too well I guess.

     So in the end, any doubt you might have about me has been crushed between my third grade fingers. If for any reason you still think I can't singlehandedly fix this world, you must be dense. I will do it and I'll show you that I am capable of doing anything. While the rest of you weaklings obsess over helping everyone, I'll be doing the world a favor by increasing the number of selfish people in the world exponentially. You all might not see the benefits of learning to only look after yourself and nobody else, but I do--you'll see. Mark my words, if any of you boneheads try to stop me-- I'll kill you.

     I've got everything planned out. 'What is my master scheme' you may be asking? Well if I flat out told it to you, it'd be no fun at all, would it?

     On another note, around the time when I was planning how I would carry this whole scheme out, I started thinking more about my family, if you can even call them that, and I realized, I don't know much about them at all. What if they aren't even my parents? What if my real father is Satan, and my real mother, Persephone? I hadn't really thought about it all that much prior, but there was one factor that made me start questioning many things.

     I had a dream one day, and it really opened my eyes. I was a newborn, if that is the correct word for it, and I was in hell. I was able to hear my parents talking, and who were my parents? Satan and Persephone.     

     "What a beautiful baby girl," said Persephone, "what shall we name her?"

     "Ebony," Hades responded, "Ebony Rasputin."

     And thus was the birth of deception incarnate. Her hair was red and whipped around in the air like the burning environment she was born in. She had no facial features, just a blank plane of pale skin lain over her skull. There were indentations where her eyes should have gone and she had no mouth or nose. In the depths of hell she stayed for millennia, until her father, Hades, decided to put her to work. He would make her a desirable girl, send her to earth, and have her deceive humanity, killing all who fell for her trap.

     And so Hades' work began. He gave her the brightest green eyes, the sweetest mouth, and a beautiful long white dress. He also gave her the ability to read and control minds. She was deceptive and manipulative. His scheme was to take over the whole world, making new slaves for his home. She was instructed to never fall in love or trust a single soul. Hades told her to always behave herself; to act Christlike. Though he winced at the thought of his own daughter being "Christlike", he knew it'd be the only way for her to fool the whole world.

     "Ebony Rasputin," said her father, "you will be the end of this world as we know it."

If that didn't give me an existential crisis, I don't know what would. Nonetheless, I knew that it must have been a sign. My father sent me on a quest to take over the world. It was fate that I met Ebony. It was fate that I discovered Satanism. It was fate that I organized this plan, and that is why I am not afraid to carry it out in full.