Pain isn't gone

It started off with my talking about my relationship with my ex girlfriend and it kinda took a twist towards the end

It's been 3 days since we've last talked..doesn't seem like much but I miss you more then anything.. And I'm scared that you're not gonna come back. We always said that if we were meant to be, we'll come back to each other.. Please, come back already.. I heard you found someone new.. I hope she treats you the way I know you've always wanted to be treated. I hope she holds your hand and spend every minute with you like if it were the last time you guys were to see each other ever again. I hope she tells you how beautiful you are.. Because god, you're gorgeous. I hope she does things that I wasn't able to do because of the retarded distance between us.. I've always wanted you to be happy and if letting me go was the only way then so be it.. I just hope you miss me as much as I miss you. I hope you get that aching empty feeling in your heart because I'm not there anymore.. That feeling hasn't left my heart since you've been gone..I hope i pop up in your mind as much as you pop up in mine. I try to escape you but even though you weren't here physically, you're literally everywhere I look.. I can't escape you. I hope you run across the picture I drew you and remember all the things we've been through.. I miss you... It was 11 o'clock at night and I was laying in bed staring up at the ceiling thinking of us.. Remember, when you told me you'd love me forever?... Did you ever keep that promise?..or did you break that one too?.. I know i said I'd never break another promise to you again but I had to break this one.. I had to slice wrist to make sure this was real and I wasn't dreaming any of this..Unfortunately, it was real.. And My wrist bled and bled making a pool of blood running under my bed and my vision was turning blurry and breathing was becoming harder for me to do.. It was your fault I woke up on a Gurney with doctors rushing me down the hospitals hallways but it's okay because that was the first time I smiled since you left. I smiled because the pain was ending.. The pain you had caused me.. But now I'm laying on a hospital bed with doctors watching me twenty four- seven.. I got 8 stitches across my wrist but the pain didn't end..