Paws And Remember: Coping With Pet Loss

A short story about how I had to euthanize my 2 dogs after 17 years and how it broke my heart. The story serves as an introduction to a short ebook i wrote that aims to help others grieving .

On that somber day in January 2023, I found myself in a private room at Laurel Pet Hospital in West Hollywood, California, accompanied by my two faithful dogs and my friend, Mike. Mike, once a receptionist at a Brooklyn pet hospital, had been through this before. It was a first for me. I was about to say my final goodbyes to both of my dogs, and I needed Mike’s presence to bolster my strength. Deep down, I knew I couldn’t face this alone.

The decision to euthanize my beloved companions weighed heavily on my heart. These two adorable dogs had been my family for the past 18 years, but it was time to lay them to rest. Over the past few years, I had watched them transition from their lively canine selves to displaying signs of dementia. A recent seizure episode involving Faust, one of my dogs, became the turning point.

Their quality of life had steadily declined, and my relocation to another home the previous year had only worsened their stress. The anxiety was relentless whenever they were home alone. Faust, born blind due to a retinal disease, had been navigating the world without sight since birth. By the time they reached eight years of age, both dogs had lost their hearing. In the weeks leading up to that fateful day, sleep eluded me as I grappled with the decision I had to make. Finally, a voice inside me whispered, 'Chris, it's time.

I believe divine strength guided me through that heart-wrenching decision. My two dogs had been my companions through most of my adult life, and the thought of navigating adulthood without them was daunting. I didn’t know how to be a grown up without them by my side but I knew that I couldn’t keep them going like this . Every
day they’d look at me and their sad puppy dog eyes said “Dad were tired” But life often thrusts us into tragedies, and we find a way to persevere because we have no other choice. Death is an undeniable part of life, and when it confronts us, we must confront it head on.

In 2018, I found myself facing homelessness due to a multitude of factors, including my own regrettable choices, some health issues, and simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I was at a loss for what to do, especially with my two loyal dogs in tow.

Thankfully, I found a place downtown on Skid Row that allowed dogs. Living in that environment was humbling, to say the least, and looking back, I'm not entirely sure how I made it through that period of my life. Well, actually, I do know how I survived that time, and it was because of my dogs. I recall being at the lowest point in my life, seriously considering an end to my existence. The only thing that kept me going were those two dogs. I would gaze into their faces with those goofy smiles and remind myself that I couldn't abandon them because, if I did, who would take care of them?The answer was nobody. Individually, none of us would have lasted a minute on our own on Skid Row, but together, somehow, we managed to get by. Those dogs saved my life.

Now, sitting in that office with Faust and Finnegan by my side and faced with the harsh reality that I had to bid farewell to the only living beings who had witnessed me at my best and most definitely at my worst was something I wasn't prepared to accept. However, the time had come.


Dealing with the loss of a pet is a uniquely personal experience. It affects each of us differently, and there’s no single path to healing. Rather than focusing on the loss, let's explore various ways to navigate this process and find a way to move forward after the loss of a pet.