Forever Mine

Rather dark.

A day today I need not tell
This day today be rememberd hell
My love this day she ran away
I found my love, with much dismay
She lay beheaded as I stare
For my well being this world not care

I wish she would've taken me
But I guess that's too much
Not too much in my reality
But this world never really gave a f**k
A f**k for me?
A f**k for my love?

This hell cares only for itself
I guess my love will still be felt
Not for for my love, not even me
Not for my dearest friend whom I always see
It shall be felt for the hole in me
The hole inside filled with misery

My love we part and I do cry
Alone inside my room I die
Perhaps to see your smiling face
Or maybe leave this hellish place
Before I go I'll wake your eyes
So, you my love, can see me die...
 

Author's Note

Any comments, confusions, criticisms, ect... much appreciated!

Reviews

[Laura]

I think I remember reading this poem a while back. It has a very classic strcuture and meter, the dialogue is very clear and direct which is wonderful, as with Justin's poem simplicity is always a virtue in poetry. The message behind it is very powerful, and it stirs a sense of remorse and sorrow in the reader. It has many levels to it, and can be interpreted in many ways. The last stanza adds an unexpected twist to the poem. It could use a bit more imagery in my opinion, but then the lack of imagery can also leave much open to the imagination as well. It is all about interpretation and perception and this poem captured that aspect of poetry quite nicely.