Let Myself Be

I just don't get it

How everything could be so perfect one day

And then the next

It's not

I put too much into it

I put my heart in too soon

That's what irritates me the most

It's still perfect in his eyes

He just wants to have fun

He doesn't want anything serious

He's just looking for a good time

I've been so confused the past couple of days

Who wouldn't want to just have a good time

Why don't I want that

That should just be enough because I can't give him what I want

I want to be serious

I want to be close

But it's too much

I couldn't even give that to him if he wanted it

I guess I was just looking for the reassurance that he liked me as much as I liked him

Sure he likes me for my looks

And any girl would be satisfied with that

So why am I not

I have to be patient

There is a mutual attraction, that much has been established

He just has his eyes on other priorities and that's okay

So should I wait

Should I just sit back and watch and see where this life will go

Should I just watch him from a distance and see if we are meant to be

It's all just the timing issue

I'll sit back

I'll let myself get back to the place I was just a little while ago

I'll let myself enjoy my life

I'll see where this life takes me

If our paths cross again I'll be grateful

If we just end up being friends I'll enjoy that too

I know we'll be in each others lives for a lifetime

And whether it's just as the best friends younger brother or as something more, I'll be content

Sometimes I wish I could make time rewind

Or make it stop

Take back some texts

Not worry so much about what he's thinking

I'll let myself be

No more thinking about him

He'll come to me

I'll stop chasing him

I'll let myself be

Author's Note

Songs that helped me get this out:
Boy - 78Violet
Too Close - Alex Clare
Tonight I'm Getting Over You - Carly Rae Jepsen

Reviews

[Scott Metro]

I think you took a lot of inventory to write this.
So many ifs ...
You did a good job.

Scott