Because I Love

Came to me in a dream, more a chorus, maybe in another dream I'll get the verses.

Because I love I can see the morning

Because I love I can see the sky

Because I love I can see the dawning

Because I love I can learn to fly

Author's Note

Came in a dream, may add more later.

Reviews

[Levi Levin]

A great simple poem. Great work!

[emipoemi]

Short, sweet, and simple. Great imagery with great musicality. My only critique is that "morning" and "dawning" are too close in meaning for a poem so short. The only way I would suggest for you to keep it, because the sound of it is good - and you might be wanting to keep it - is to change the "see"'s. If it's "see the morning", "see[ing] the sky" is a little close, a stronger word for "see" would make it more meaningful. And the "see the dawning", because it's so close in meaning to "morning", but enough to be complementary to it, this "see" makes it presence bland just like it makes the last line appear bland, since it's supposed to be complementing "sky". So if you can "see" the morning, do something else to the "dawning" that spawns off "see[ing] the morning" just like "learn" spawns off "see the sky" (but that "see" as mentioned should be changed to something else, since every line in a way is playing off each other).

Well done overall.

[Cindy Marietta]

Like the simplicity of this poem, while it still has great meaning and depth!