The Dance

Two turns later we're in the same spot...

Last night,

I lay in the grass,

watched the stars

in their eternal dance;

turning inconceivably slow-

or is it inconceivably fast?-

until they return

to the same spot,

yesterday, tomorrow, and forever.

Ever changing, yet

ever the same.

As I lay,

watching

I couldn’t help but wonder

Are we any different?

we dance,

turning-

be it too slow or too fast,

we know not-

until returning to the same point,

yesterday, tomorrow, and forever.

we preach change,

we need change.

We never change.

We turn,

dancing elegant,

fast

then slow.

Until,

at last and always,

we end just the same as we began.

It matters not

how many twists,

pirouettes,

or flips

we incorporate this time

the result is the same.

It matters not

how much we tell ourselves:

this time is different

this is a new thinker

this is progress.

the dance is circuitous;

our spot in the sky will never change.

Author's Note

Been experimenting, I know it's not the best. Haven't had much time to write as of late, so in my little time, I have been trying new styles. Once again, a bit rushed so I know it's not my best, but, as always, feedback is encouraged!

Reviews

[John the Baptist]

Nature often demonstrates to us that all existence is interconnected. In this offering the poet sees in the stars patterns that reflect our own tendencies. This is not bad news. Indeed, the more we are able to quietly observe the universe around us, the more we learn about ourselves. Insightful piece.

[Corbin Driver]

"I LAID in the grass", in line 2. This is the only problem I see in the poem.

[Crozby]

I have been meaning to fix this since I posted it. Thank you for pointing it out though!

[Corbin Driver]

No Problem

[barleygirl]

This is very beautiful & well-written. I love the idea of doing an extensive comparison between something in nature & something philosophical, which you've carried out here with nice uniformity & great imagination. Any different reader could take a different jumping off point & your words propel them along their own discovery as to how this has been the case for them, too. I love the way you are honest in your assessment of humanity, but the critique doesn't feel too stinging becuz it's obvious this is presented in an understanding way, to broaden all our understandings (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Kailani]

Wow, this is an awesome poem! I like how you compared us to the stars and opened people's minds to our similarities.

[Sammie Sanchez]

wow, this piece is very expressive of the fact that life is just a repetition of itself, which i liked. I enjoyed the relation you made with the stars and life. Good work C:

[Vasilees Sybissyl]

It's a lively poem! Those lines,

turning inconceivably slow-

or is it inconceivably fast?-

until they return


Hoe can one not fall in love!! Beautiful.

Love,
Vasilees.

[Suhd]

I like the music in this poem. Beautifully expressed!

[Davidgeo]

It's not inconceivably slow, or fast. . . it's inconceivably distant.

And your last line is just plain inaccurate. . . our spot in the sky always changes. It's why astrology makes no sense. . . astrological precession is a term I recommend you familiarize yourself with. Your metaphors here don't currently make sense given those facts. . . sophomoric understanding always leads to shallow metaphors and writing.

[apennylate]

"Not the best"... What truly is our "best"... Sorta subjective, sorta not... Who knows...
I loved the circuitous journey your rhyme slant makes amongst the twirls and spills of always returning to default... Do we ever change...? Who knows... With change this was written, and no change seems to appear... So I guess we can keep writing... Well done, mate