Dark Disease

I drip clotted ink into the clear water resting in your palms. So pure a thing disturbed by my dark disease. 

A light shone in your eyes brighter than the sun you carry in your chest but it has been wittled down and down until the faintest glimmer remains. 

My disease is ravenous and ugly. It tears the orb from your chest, smashing it into a thousand fading embers.

Save the light inside your veins before I choke the life from your throat.

Reviews

[Lovecraft]

It's pretty good, but definitely needs a bit of work. Try to double the length, it's much too short. Dark and somewhat brooding though, which I enjoyed. Just add a couple verses and it will be far better in my humble opinion.