Crushes and Kisses

This poem was inspired by a time in my life when I had the biggest crush ever, and how I'm over it.

Crushes and kisses. By Sangeetha

Love, so vague.
Love, so plain.
Love, so confusing.
Love, too much pain.

Love, what a bore.
Love, people always want more.
Love, I suppose isn't bad.
Love, is after all blind as a bat.

Love, will be your downfall.
Love, I don't like it at all.
Love, tore my heart.
Love, could cure a part.

But once fallen you'll never look back
For your stuck with it like blue tack.
Careful now, it's poison lurks
Careful who you love if you want the perks.

I was once a love sick puppy
But now I'm free of a fool.
Happy I will forever be
Reminded me to never be a tool.

Many were misguided by it
But fret not anymore
I'll teach all that I know
So you'll never lose your core.

Lock your heart up with a chain and lock
Throw the key away and have your heart blocked.
Don't worry there's nothing left for misses
Everything will be better for not dealing with crushes and kisses.

Author's Note

I know won't a lot of you out there share the same views about love but once you have a horrible experience with a extremely hard to get over crush...you'll think twice about liking anyone again... Gimme a high five for those who have gone through the same
Hope you guys like this piece anyways.

Reviews

[Érenn]

OK I am here. Since I would end up reading your comments and chat thread With Shadow on my review, kinda became hard now not to check your write. I always read the first ones posted here (Gives me an idea later if your writing has evolved or you were good to begin with and have just got better at expressing it).

I will talk about the poem itself then my experience with love.

Good Points: You try to invoke imagery and your metaphors though not unique it is not cliched at the same time. I like the fact how your poem talks both about the obsession and the realization of how it can hurt as well.

Points to Improve on: Overall though rhymes are forced. A Poem's not all about the rhymes (Don worry I did the same thing with my first ever poem and because I forced it to rhyme the feelings i wanted to convey got a little sidetracked) . The flow of a write should be maintained and thus you need better word choices. Don't just add words to make it rhyme while the message you wanted to convey there becomes vague. And the use of word Love, becomes jarring here, especially in the first stanza. I am guessing you used it so many times to convey obsession. Maybe it wasn't required to such an extent.

Overall conclusion: You do a good job trying to convey your feelings here it is definitely relatable, in my case my first crush metaphorically died right in front of my eyes. Doesn't become easy to get over it. It's hard not to keep our guard up and not trust the feeling of love that easily the second time around.There are many points here you have mentioned which do make sense and I agree with them. That is where better word choices would have enhanced the read. But then again your honest raw feelings on this write make it an enjoyable read nonetheless. Thank you for sharing ^^

Sorry I am often blunt about what I liked and what I didn't, hopefully I wasn't rude. ^^'

[Sangeetha]

Thank you for your review, actually agree with you a lot on that point on improvement I'll try to kind of squeeze out the poem and not the rhymes, it's just so hard when you write and the flow just wants you to rhyme, but yeah you really read my mind on this one. That was the exact same thing I thought when I read shadows stuff cos hers is like poem at its core not just the rhymes you know what I'm saying. It's kind of hard to write the way she dies in the sense that she has word choices going for her. But than again I don't really like the idea of having to plan a poem when I can just let it flow? If you don't agree than its totally fine with me yeah...

[Érenn]

Na I think I totally agree with you ^^ in fact if you end up reading my initial works and and then maybe one of my latest you will understand how far I have come within a matter of month and a half ^^ (the very first poem I wrote was indeed at the very same time period I mentioned here) Of course For that though I would write a piece a day maybe 2 or 3 sometimes in one day, But it helped definitely. And I try various writing styles, that helps in thinking of the same topic in more than one ways and yet helps to express what you feel. Then you can write the same thing in more than one ways, that I think is the fun element of poetry ^^

[Sangeetha]

Ooh its exactly how I do my art my styles of painting and drawing does change over time as I grab influences from different artists.although I already have a recognisable style that does identify as mine I'm still trying to improve with more varieties of concepts and drawing styles...so its really cool how poetry follows that same procedure of finding your own thing when you write.

[Érenn]

Yeah true being in the creative arts field myself I understand what you mean here ^^

[barleygirl]

The repetitive nature of your writing (especially the first half) shows us the obsessive nature of one's thoughts when stuck in a superficial "crush" . . . I don't think it's necessary to write "Love" on the first dozen lines -- once would've been sufficient & we know all that follows relates to Love. In places, it feels like you're reaching for a few of those rhymes, as the line doesn't make perfect sense with the chosen rhyming word (I think it's better to convey clear meaning & rhyming is secondary to that goal). In the end, I totally understand how one wants to protect one's own heart from ever going there again. You've showed us this well.

[Sangeetha]

Thank you for your review I'm sure to make s note on that. I'm also glad you liked it in the end

[V]

Sometimes one feels like this but you'll be in love again, believe me. ^^
Reminds me a little of my poem Barricade the Doors, similiar content in a way. I like the line " careful who you love ".

[Sangeetha]

Oh yeah it does sound like your poem barricade the doors loved your version too.

[Inject Positivity]

oh my god! sangeetha i do agree with you... all the things you have pointed out here is so true... i have experienced heartbreak, i have kept my heart locked for so long because i feared of another heartbreak... your message is exceptional and very true... but you know we all crave for it, without love there is no beauty of life, you can spend your 50 yrs locking your heart but one day your heart will want to open it...


i agree with you..... heartbreak teaches us so many lessons, i know the pain of it but i know the beauty of it too... a very relatable write.... hats off! 200 ratings!!!

[Sangeetha]

thanks soo much for that big bro but you are very right i too sometimes crave for it although i think that i have it airtight sealed, love always seem to find a way through some overlooked crack.

[Inject Positivity]

yes it will find you sister... you can't keep it away for too long... we were meant to love and to be loved.... our heavenly father created us out of love....

[Sangeetha]

oh well im jus not too caught up in it thats all when it finds me it finds me you know until than im gonna ROCK AT BEING SINGLE!!! haha

[Inject Positivity]

yup! that's a better idea than blocking your heart... enjoy being single now, so when you find love you don't have to think about being single again...

[Sangeetha]

i suppose so..the main reason i feel why i avoid love is to avoid lust dont wanna be anywhere near it ..so disgusting yuck.

[Inject Positivity]

i agree with it too... stay safe from it... look and wait for true love... it will be worth waiting....

[Jess]

Oh my God! So relatable. I agree with you...absolutely right.

''Careful now, it's poison lurks
Careful who you love if you want the perks. ''---love this line

Well written. A nice message.

[Sangeetha]

Ahhhh!!! Thnx soo much jess I am sooo happy to see that I'm not the only one ...who knew you got the crushies that bad once too?