A Day In The Life of Man Part 1

A Day In The Life of Man Part 1

A Story by Crazy Cat Man

Man wakes up in the morning. His farts wakes him up. Man says “What the f**k” and he continues to fart. “ Damn it and I was having good dream too. I was f*****g Salma Hayek” . Men gets up from his bed and grabs his gun next to the bed. He locks and loads the gun and walks downstairs to the kitchen. His wife is finishing breakfast for him. She says “Good morning hun.” . Man replies “Whatever B***h” His wife ignores the rude comment “Here’s your toast and eggs just how you like em.”. Man smells the toast and eggs then throws it on the ground. Man yells “ B***h you made the toast too toasty.”. His scared wife responds “I’m sorry hun.”

        Man slaps his wife across the face and leaves the house. Man then starts to look for a car. He sees a Lamborgini Diabolo across the street. A young teenage boy is about to drive the car. Man walks up to the boy and draws his gun on the boy. Man tells the boy
“Boy you better give me this motherfucken car.”. The boy raises his hands and exits the car. Man enters the car is drives off. He runs past a red light. Man says “F**k the lights. Don’t tell me when to stop driving. I stop driving when I feel like it.” A police car spots Man driving fast and starts to chase after Man.
        
Man pulls out his gun and starts to shoot at the police behind him. He shoots the police car at the engine and the police car blows up. Man yells out loud “Whooo hooo. Good shot. No one f***s with the Man.”. Man finally arrives at his destination. His work place. He illegally parks the car at a handicap spot. He then enters his work place. His female coworker approaches Man and tells him “You’re late for work”. Man replies “I don’t give a f**k. Do I look like I give a f**k?” The female coworker walks away.

Man walks to his Boss’s office. “Well look he finally decided to show up for work, well if it isn’t the Man himself” says The Boss. Man then takes his gun puts it on his Boss’s head. “Now you listen to me, you’re gonna give me raise” says Man. The Boss pees in his pants and says “Sure whatever you want”.

A Day In The Life of Man Part 2

A Day In The Life of Man Part 2
A Story by The Reviewer

© 2009 Crazy Cat Man


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Reviews

You are so funny! All of your poems and stories are very entertaining to me. I think some people just take things too seriously.

Posted 17 Years Ago


6 of 7 people found this review constructive.

I need more five stars. :D

Posted 17 Years Ago


5 of 6 people found this review constructive.

Sooo....whatchoo smokin? lol Funny piece. Although I don't think this is realistic (haha wonder why) in any sense I'm sure you and Ren think about it all the time....when your playing Grand Theft Auto (God I love that game!) But anyway it was alright. Could be better if you took out some of the slapping or gun pulling or added more action or something....IDK but it was funny! Kudos

Posted 17 Years Ago


7 of 8 people found this review constructive.

you have a crazy mind. where do you come up with this? here is a gramatical problem:

"Man enters the car is drives off" doesn't make sense. it's interesting...I'll read the sequel.

Posted 17 Years Ago


8 of 9 people found this review constructive.

LMAO the "action" definitely stereotypes what a man would WANT to do. It's like how we wanna be in an action movie and just pop shots like in BAD BOYS or RUSH HOUR. I know I'll be into watching an action movie and all the while I'm thinkin "MAN, I WANNA SHOOT A BAD GUY WITH A TECH! DAT'S GANGSTA!!!!!"

I can see from the other reviews that some people really took this stuff to heart. Some people need to chilllll.

To me, this piece was entertainment. Something Dave Chapelle would do!

I guess a lot of people who don't have a sense of humor just won't let stuff slide!
They need to know that writing doesn't have to be so damn deep and serious all the time. Just my opinion on all this! Good s**t to me! Keep writing for yer fans! DO yer thing homie!

Posted 17 Years Ago


8 of 9 people found this review constructive.

Ha! This is great, funny as hell! Sounds like some men I've ran into!

Posted 17 Years Ago


8 of 12 people found this review constructive.

I'd say only a few a these folks understood what was being said (albeit not much). Should every worthwhile piece of art be pretty and happy and good? Do you know what I mean by 'good'? "Written so poorly that it is actually annoying to read."? Why not written so cleverly that it is actually annoying to read? Would you be the slightest bit annoyed to actually encounter 'the Man'? I think some a ya'll oughta stop bitchin' so much and learn to be a man.

Posted 17 Years Ago


8 of 13 people found this review constructive.

It was pretty good...I have to agree with Mike about the slapping and constant gun-pulling messing it up.

I would like to give you a congratulations on being featured.

Posted 17 Years Ago


9 of 14 people found this review constructive.

It's decent, I mean I got some laughs but the slapping and constant gun pulling ruined it for me. also huge amounts of work need to be done, but I do like it's simplicity. However, you must hate us men. I enjoy it and I'm glad you got a feautre, just how this got is is beyond me. You can do better. ANd self-help? seriously? maybe humor and satire next time.

Posted 17 Years Ago


11 of 15 people found this review constructive.

Did you play too much grand theft auto last night?

Posted 17 Years Ago


10 of 15 people found this review constructive.


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Added on February 6, 2008
Last Updated on March 4, 2009

Author

Crazy Cat Man
Crazy Cat Man

New York, NY



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