Why You're Still Single

A poem inspired by a friend of a friend who is not my friend but he has a problem getting a date. He has no personality and is boring. People are getting tired being nice to him. Its like charity work

You're still trying to get a girlfriend
So you go to every event
You even started taking dance lessons
Dude, you're pathetic
You have no personality
You should go and buy one
You're not any fun
Dude you're boring
All the girls are snoring
When they hear your stories
No wonder why you're lonely
You're annoying
You can't get a date
You're very lame
If you don't make a change
You will never bring a girl home
You will spend your life alone

Girl, you wonder why you can't get a boyfriend
Cuz you're crazy
And you're also easy
A guy won't take you seriously
If you give it up so easily
You're also weird
Which makes every man want to stay clear
No one wants to be near
A crazy b***h
I'm sorry for saying this
You also need therapy
You even agreed with me
I pray to god that you stay away from me
I will ignore your phonecalls
Get off my balls
I don't want to be you with at all
And you wonder why you're still single

Reviews

[The Random Writings Of ..]

My, oh my - Coming from a girls point of view first I have seen many girls acting this way, and well it cracks me up. Have you ever heard that song by Amy Winehouse? Fucked up Pumps? Well that could be applied here. If you haven't heard that song listen to it :)
Now on to the men part - LOVE IT! I recently went out on a date with a guy, no personality, and BORING! I tried my hardest to be pleasant, but when we started talking about subject he pretended to know everything about yet knew nothing he actually called me stupid. ON A FIRST DATE!!! And then he tells me He has no idea why he is still single. I was nice and said I have no idea. lol.
Love to poem - so funny, and so true! Thanks for sharing!

[Crazy Cat Man]

thanks. i just had to write this. :) im glad it made u laugh and sorry u had to go through the boring guy date :(

[Crazy Cat Man]

oh and yes i heard that song from Amy Winehouse. i love it. too bad she ended up dating a bad boy and he got her into drugs

[The Random Writings Of Me..Kates]

I know sad! Such a tragic loss.

[Wolf]

I've seen a million guys and girls like this... It's just....I dunno...sad!
Is it that hard to be yourself with a girl and don't lie about the scar on your hand, saying that it's from an assault on the street (when actually you cut yourself like an idiot, while playing chef)?!
And girls...EVERY TIME when they see a guy acting all sweet and stuff she thinks "This guy wants to screw me" and that kind of crap...When will those girls learn that a guys acts nice with you because he likes you or because THAT's his way to be?!!

Anyway...I loved you poem :P XD Looking forward to reading new stuff ^_^

[Kaylor Mason]

I'm commenting here because I can't leave a review--this website is malfunctioning again. This poem is so true . . . I almost didn't read it, because as I read it I thought "Hey . . . this reminds me of me." Someone ought to point out that there is someone for everyone out there . . . just takes time. Lots of time and patience . . . especially patience.

[Melody]

I can relate so much with the girl it's awful...But the poem is funny! Lol

[Gothic Girl]

haha LOl. another true to life poetry. :)

[外人 (Gaiji..]

Well that was far from being "poetic" .... thanks :'(
I can relate so much with the guy, it hurts :(

[marlayesterday]

This makes me sad for them, but I also say these two should hook up. Problem solved. :)

[Crazy Cat Man]

LOL yes they should hook up

[Wolf]

Indeed...while reading the poem I was something like..."Dude with problems...Girl with same problems... Put them in the same room!" and let Magic do it's stuff :P :D

[Crazy Cat Man]

its crazy what just happened to me now. i went to catholic dating event in NY. and i was talking to 2 girls. then one dude came up and pretended to be my friend.....blah long story short he tried to cockblock me..after the girls left he said 'im sorrry for cockblocking u, but i saw u talking to 2 girls i just had to get one of them' then he called me a ladies man....i was in total shock wow...are people that desperate? man i might write a poem about that

[Wolf]

they're not desperate...just asses...so what if you're talking to 2 girls?! maybe they are your friends...or relatives... :|

[marlayesterday]

Yeah maybe you were trying to find common ground with one of them, you know, looking at them as people and not cattle. Men like that, if they can be called that, make me not a little on the inside....

[marlayesterday]

Not a little ill that should say....

[Destinyxi]

Dude, you're pathetic
You have no personality
You should go and buy one

That part made me laugh :P

You also needs therapy >>> need

This is a great poem. Another humorous one. I love how most of your poems, if you write about a guy, you'll also add a girls version to it.

[L0v3craft]

maybe you should hook your boring friend up with a crazy one-- who knows, i mean opposites do attract ;p

luvin the mean streak in this as well as the wit ^-^

[Crazy Cat Man]

nope.....the dude is not my friend lol. i wanna make that clear LOL. just a friend of a friend. everyone feels sorry for him. i told him he should try internet dating since hes failing miserably. I think I should do that too lol

[That_Girl]

I agree with her... they should marry.

[L0v3craft]

There, you see that? Another great and amazing intellectual has sided with me because she has brains and can clearly see the truth here! xD lmfao


And pffft, n***a, I only said friend for brevity's sake :P

[Crazy Cat Man]

that dude is pathetic. he tried to cockbock me tonight. i was talking to 2 girls then he tried his best to barge in....the girl clearly saw that he is boring and ignored him and kept talking to me.....its a madhouse..the dating game

[L0v3craft]

I think you're being selfish...com' on now...TWO GIRLS and TWO of YOU, lol xD

Maybe one of them was at least semi-psycho b***h...maaaaaybe ^3^

[Crazy Cat Man]

ugh. i was in total shock. afterwards one guy apologize to me. he said. im sorry for trying to cockblock u but u were talking to 2 girls and i need one of them. wow i never heard anyone say that.

[L0v3craft]

Dude...what's your beef with the bored guy? Give im a break. Its not his fault his mother didn't do drugs while she was pregnant. S**t happens.

You should be the good guy and just set him up with some psycho crazy b***h. I mean who knows, you might do yourself a favor...the crazy lady might kill 'im in his sleep...or maybe with a stroke of serendipitous luck her depravity will be contagious and he'll catch it...then his boring, dull personality will mutate from the contagions transfered from all the craziness and voila! A newly fleshed out psychopath will be reborn anew and he'll be fun to have at parties! Whoohoo!

PS. (I hear insanity can be caught like an STD...so, ladies and gents, if you do not wish to be escorted to the nearest asylum nor analyzed by some Indian shrink, plz do yourselves a favor and wear a condom)

[Crazy Cat Man]

oops im confusing u.......the boring guy was there.he failed miserably cuz the girl ignored him........then another guy came along and was aggressive. i was in shocked when he called me a ladies man and he wanted one of the girls i was talking to......i had no response to that.im writing a new poem about it. when im done ill post it

[L0v3craft]

Nah, you didn't confuse me, I just felt like bringing the boring guy back up because its fuuuuuun ;P

Pffft, who cares about the other n***a xD

[L0v3craft]

oh, my bad, forgot to say can't wait for the new poem!

[That_Girl]

Great and amazing intellectual... yup, that's me. ;) Thank you for realizing that, Angel. :D

[L0v3craft]

np, luv :D

[Baby Ricochet]

Good Relevent poem.

[That_Girl]

Hahaha you sound like such an a*****e. But, it's okay. :) Loved it!

[Crazy Cat Man]

hey somestimes i have to be a*****e. im a nice guy but damn some people just suck and we cant help them and they can suck us dry. its good to set boundaries.

[That_Girl]

Haha you know I was joking... mostly. :p But yeah, people do suck.

[Crazy Cat Man]

;)