Never Ask

you should never ask a woman these questions when you're on a date

These are the questions
You should never ask a woman
On your first date
Never Ask a woman her age
She will spray you in the face with mace
Never Ask a woman
About how many boyfriends she's had
You will not like the answer
And you will get mad
Never Ask a woman about her weight
She will get upset
And slap you in face
Never Ask a woman about kids
She will get sad
And tell you about all of her friends who did
Never Ask a woman about marriage
Now you're date wont get salvage

Never Ask a guy about his job
He will get sad
Because it does not pay enough
Never Ask a guy about his Ex-girlfriends
That's a big no-no
Cuz you're afraid he'll compare them to you
Never Ask a guy about his future plans
He's taking it a day at a time
He's not in a rush to be your future husband
Never Ask a guy about his hair
Cuz he's slowly losing it
And that's not fair
Never Ask a guy his mom
Because he is whipped
And will talk about her a lot


So if you really like the person
And want the relationship to last
Remember these questions
That you should never ask

Reviews

[writingurl14]

lol this is great!

[oxo]

thanks for your advice. :) haha nice poem anyway.

[Katie Flores]

I like how you do both view points. funny stuff

[Crazy Cat Man]

yes its true never ask these questions on a first date :P

[Baby Ricochet]

HA! Funny!

[外人 (Gaiji..]

That was incredibly interesting, I had a lot of fun seeing you figure out not just what guys don't want to be asked but also what GIRLS don't want to be asked ! The structure was clearly functional to the "storytelling" (first stanza = what you shouldn't ask her; second stanza = what you shouldn't ask him; third stanza = conclusion). Also found some rhymes and assonances out there, I really enjoyed it. Great job !

[Alicia Schroeder]

This was a fun way of the what not to do.. lol, really enjoyed this one..

[Debbie_Philly]

LOL... Very fun read... very playful.... and true in some points for sure..;)

[R.A. Youngblood]

Wow! You're some kind of adviser. In the future, when i go on the date, if a boy ask me some of these things, i'll break the relationship and say a few words. xD
Let's get to the point.. This was very fun to read, and it's very powerful and truthful to me. Hilarious!
Thanks for sharing..Keep it up buddy :D

[Crazy Cat Man]

just gotta have fun with it :P im gonna recite at a event in NY. we'll see how will the crowd respond :P

[R.A. Youngblood]

Yeah..
I wish you the best on that evening. It'll be fun, don't worry :D

[Crazy Cat Man]

Awwww thanks :)

[R.A. Youngblood]

You're welcome xD

[I Am Svetlana]

Yes, it is important to know these certain things to avoid asking or talking about on a date. Though some risk it anyway in hopes of an average answer and for someone to cover up their feelings and answer anyway without the other knowing it might effect them inside. All that matters is that a person is honest and straight forward about themselves, they should never lie to get a person to like or accept them. If they are ashamed, they won't talk about or go near the subject or topic at hand. Even if a person feels uncomfortable with the topic, they might just answer anyway just to get it over with.

[Crazy Cat Man]

first dates always suck. its always awkward at first cuz the other person is nervous. So I just wanted to make fun the of nervousnous of the first date. To make a silly poem to avoid certain questions. :P

[I Am Svetlana]

Well, sure things can be awkward at first simply because you are first getting to know them. And it's a cute poem, nonetheless.

[Crazy Cat Man]

Yeah and the 2nd dates things so smoother. I'm gonna recite this poem soon @ a event

[I Am Svetlana]

Aw, I hope that goes well :)
What event is it?

[Crazy Cat Man]

Ohhhh theres lots of poetry events in NY. so im slowly building a reputation as a comedic poet :P dont know when im gonna recite "Never Ask" but I am gonna recite "the 3rd date rule" and "safe sex" at a erotica poetry event in NY tonight :P thats gonna be funny

[I Am Svetlana]

Well, I hope you do well and have a good time :) And i'm sure you'll build a reputation of some sort, we all do but it just takes time. Good luck!

[Crazy Cat Man]

Thanks the crowd laughed hard. I had to stop reading to let the crowd finish laughing :P

[I Am Svetlana]

Haha, well that's a good sign :) Glad you did well!

[Ama May Cooper]

Produces little giggles at parts, a humourus piece of work. I like the little descriptions between the specfic questions adds a personal touch and makes the piece all the funnier.
I found no flow at all in this piece, for the first time in reading poetry this didn't really bother me , the lack of flow was well insignificant. Your poem worded its way brilliant regardless of tempo and word arrangement. Loved it

[Crazy Cat Man]

thanks for your review as always. u always give insightful reviews. To be honest I never really care about tempo or arrangement. Cuz i consider myself a comedian so i let the audience respond to what I say with each line :P gracias............ Oh this poem got inspired when i was at a bday party and I asked the girl how old she was and I knew she didnt want to say her age....so i just had to write this :P