Suicides are statistics. The suicidal are those close to you.
A whisper in the clouds at night
where concrete stars provide no light
the beauty here will never fade
like dewdrops off the morning blade
An iron maiden in the locks
where pained souls fight, bound in knots
the dust remains in crack and crook
like wooden shelves with highest book
nothing on the surface wrong
but deep beneath I'll always long
to read the letter, break the glass
Optimism in the past.
The drug kicks in with bitter taste
pulling teeth from all who faced
a drowning child in the midst
of badland boulders and clenched fist
Words I've never heard before
reach my ears like an unsound score
no violin or harpsicord
my heart and mind - in two they tore
A whisper in the clouds at night
now change the mood from dark to fright
with galaxies and roaming moons
I hope to speak with the real you
An epiphany of broken youth
my eyes doth yearn to know the truth
I'd cry to see bright light fade first
I'd fight to know who broke this earth
unfettered strands of my perfection
hold on to this hidden pendant
the aid of one who cares will come
to bear the fruit of kingdoms won.
The drug kicks in with bitter taste
on picture torn and lines erased
no colour in the shadowed hill
like faded paint on barnyard mill
oh Angel of this desolation
scripture leaves, in place takes patience
stimulation renders tasteless
the life I lead, no longer faceless.
A whisper in the clouds at night
'cross beds of sand with pillowbite
rubber spirits hang their heads
as loving friends spill red instead
no chain or ball around the heel
our senses on, eyes are peeled
for years to have this sentence served
I'll spread my wings as if a bird
then move your hands into the dark
emerge, embrace, enlarge, embark
you'll look at me though you're above,
our worlds colliding, days soft from love.
Heartbreaking, yet breath taking in imagery, loss of any life is hard, but taking ones life is tragic, and I always feel for those left behind who suffer years of agony and guilt, having been in a situation close to home, you are right...........it is those close to you........ you have a gift with words...........I will enjoy watching you progress as the years go on............
"A whisper in the clouds at night
where concrete stars provide no light
the beauty here will never fade
like dewdrops off the morning blade
An iron maiden in the locks
where pained souls fight, bound in knots
the dust remains in crack and crook
like wooden shelves with highest book
nothing on the surface wrong
but deep beneath I'll always long
to read the letter, break the glass
Optimism in the past.
The drug kicks in with bitter taste
pulling teeth from all who faced
a drowning child in the midst
of badland boulders and clenched fist
Words I've never heard before
reach my ears like an unsound score
no violin or harpsicord
my heart and mind - in two they tore
A whisper in the clouds at night
now change the mood from dark to fright
with galaxies and roaming moons
I hope to speak with the real you
An epiphany of broken youth
my eyes doth yearn to know the truth
I'd cry to see bright light fade first
I'd fight to know who broke this earth
unfettered strands of my perfection
hold on to this hidden pendant
the aid of one who cares will come
to bear the fruit of kingdoms won.
The drug kicks in with bitter taste
on picture torn and lines erased
no colour in the shadowed hill
like faded paint on barnyard mill
oh Angel of this desolation
scripture leaves, in place takes patience
stimulation renders tasteless
the life I lead, no longer faceless.
A whisper in the clouds at night
'cross beds of sand with pillowbite
rubber spirits hang their heads
as loving friends spill red instead
no chain or ball around the heel
our senses on, eyes are peeled
for years to have this sentence served
I'll spread my wings as if a bird
then move your hands into the dark
emerge, embrace, enlarge, embark
you'll look at me though you're above,
our worlds colliding, days soft from love."
This was an amazing poem.. i JUST have NO words to expline it!
The rhyme scheme was excellent, it was great all the way through, and the sadness of the poem was gripping, and i agree with you statement, that even ones close to you dont know whats going on inside.
This was beautifully expressed- the rhyme scheme was wonderful, though at places I found it close to dominating the words. Otherwise, wonderfully done. I loved the imagery and emotions- very well penned.
Loved the imagery your poem brought to me. I have relatives and friends who have committed suicide. Just seeing how it destroys the one's you've left behind is reason enough not to do it. There have been times where it looked like the easy way out. But I could never hurt my family like that. Lovely poem.
Posted 14 Years Ago
Wow! I love this! I really like rhyming so this got me :)
So true love! This is a poignant reminder too, amazing work, I love this!
Serious kudos!
Those closest often find it hard to voice their real intentions or emoptions!
Great poem, moving and unsettling, sad and yet powerful enough to bring it home!
Hugs
xx
this is (for me) your best piece..it's meter is impeccable - the rhyme is thoughtful and creative and this holds a depth with the words that make to stop and think..I have re read it and it is better the second time around..bravo - brilliant
"If you chase two rabbits, you will lose them both." - Native American saying
Twenty years. A poet, an author, an expressionist. I believe in originality, I believe in art, I believe in myself.
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