Meet Muse

I remember him right after my mother died 

our conversations began around six years old.

He fondly recalled me as his 'little girl' and 

I remember him, my invisible friend. 

I could hear him even then, guiding me.

But not always.  

I couldn't hear in the cafeteria with the background clatter and chatter

but alone on the bleachers during the study period

while the others were sleeping or reading

we would talk in the quiet of my mind.

He asked me once that if I was able to choose 

a superpower, what would it be? Of course,

I wanted to be invisible too, 

but since that one was off the table

I told him I would wish to be able to speak

telepathically to a special little boy who 

would one day be my soulmate

if we would talk to each other, neither of us would

ever be lonely. I thought perhaps I'd write a book 

about it one day.

But I never have.

When I was in second, he suggested  

 "If you should see an airplane, hold your arms out like wings and then tip as if turning the plane and the plane would do the same thing to signal "A hello"  so every time I saw an Airplane,  that is what I did.

 Once doing so,  my teacher saw me through the glass window

of our classroom as it was adjourning. 

 As I was about to take my seat at my assigned desk,  she asked 

"what in the world were you doing out there?"

When I informed her that I was signaling a hello to the pilot 

she laughed at me and said,  "How Silly of you!" 

"that the pilot could not possibly see you from so far away. "

So I took my seat as the whole class laughed at me.

That is when I stopped listening for him, at least 

until much later in life. 

Now, rekindled he will not be quiet, he flickers in the back 

quietly like a candle

 He watches, often warn of dangers such as smoking in bed,

*since quit after falling asleep with one in my fingers

or to "watch my step"   just before I broke both of my feet tumbling 

on a landscape incline with a laundry basket and frequently tries to orchestrate my dreams if too happy or sappy into nightmares.

He says he likes to watch me be brave. 

We write poetry. 

Mostly, I write bad poetry, as I omit quite a bit or can't recall it correctly. Mainly I'm just too sleepy to wake and write it down when this happens. 

I call him Muse.

P.s. Dear Muse, 

If you are listening, I  have always abhorred the word stupid, but we 

often have to live with it.

Reviews

[Tara]

I love your voice and your muse. So comforting to know he is your writing partner.

[Corset]

:D Miss Tara! Thank you! He can be a comfort, but he can also be a smuck at times too...but hopely what is bound by the universe finds a way to be more cordial of late.

[Corset]

...but I would be lost without his words, I certainly wouldn't be able to write at all if he was to suddenly disembark.

[barleygirl]

I was holding my breath as I read, becuz this is so unbelievable. Your self-honesty is so sharp & delightful, both in it's stinging aspects, as well as the warm & fuzzy ones. I can't tell if this is fiction or not, but it sure reads like it happened to you. The way this is told is so urgently present (((HUGS)))

[Corset]

joined by the inner ear I'm afraid :D

[Coyote Poetry]

I agree dear Corset.
"P.s. Dear Muse,
If you are listening, I have always abhorred the word stupid, but we
often have to live with it"
I liked the above lines and it sad. We kill the imagination of a child. Thank you dear friend for sharing the amazing poetry and your thoughts.
Coyote

[Corset]

Thank you Coyote, I'm sure she is retired or passed away by now, she was in the position to shape so many beautiful minds, shame on her.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome dear Corset.

[Chris Shaw]

I love how you said hello to the airplane. It was so visual, I saw it clearly. What fun it would to be invisible for a while. I too as a child wished for that. You have a guardian angel hovering in your mind, protecting you, talking to you in this poem. If this is autobiographical I want to hug that child who has lost her mother. A loss at that age must have left a huge hole Corset. The whole poem touched on many emotions. Thankfully I haven't known many thoughtless teachers. Long may your muse and you work on poems and stupid is not a word that enters my mind when I read you.

Chris

[Corset]

Good Morning Chris, thank you for your wonderful comments.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Stupid? Not you, and you do not write bad poetry.
If this is autobiographical, I like the idea of that friend who is like a guardian angel in the mind.
And you know what? I think that pilot did see you...and probably turned as soon as you went inside.
Shame on that teacher for embarrassing you in front of the class.
I would never do that to one of my students.
I try to make all of them look good and get some self=confidence---
Maybe I saw that plane, too, Corset.
j.

[Corset]

I've had many amazing teachers since thankfully, I have the highest regard for teachers actually. There are some who just should not try teach though. The actual word was "stupid" she used, not "silly" hence my aversion to the word in general. It's an extremely hurtful word.