about my father

I what to know my father but he's making it hard to get to know him right now. I just going to have to wait till I'm 18 so I can see him when I want and tell him things like what I want for my birthday and Christmas so do I keep righting in a notebook that is for him or what. it's hard when you find out that your father was there when you were born and then your father leaves you when you are just a baby and he doesn't want to  know how I am doing and that's not cool to know that your father does not want to know how you are doing:(

need some help

love Cora jenness