Justification

I’m fat. I’m ugly. I’m so undesirable

And yet there’s this thought that in my heart

There is gold and metal

But it’s hot and it burns.

So beware of its fire.

Believe in the gold for it shows itself sometimes.

Quite often, too.

But what if you don’t see what it can do?

I can’t make promises.

I try and I try to uphold my appearance,

My actions, and my thoughts;

To nurse the good, to weed out and re-do the bad.

Yet it remains, so I at least try to curb them.

Does the bad outweigh the good?

I really don’t want it to.

But I only see me one way through my own eyes.

Everyone else’s shoes are too big or too small.

Try as I might, my view is all that I have.

I’d ask someone, but they’d look at me strange.

How I wish I knew what others could see.

But as I am human I guess I’ll settle.

So for all the bad, I’ll increase my good.

I’ll do what I can so that my all can be seen.

Not all on the outside but on the inside too.