Tender Hearts

I feel like a first grader when it comes to writing about the heart, so feel free to slam me;

Tender Hearts

 

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A tiny tender heart pure and white,

So innocent and giving like dawn’s morning light

Every morning and late twilights twinkle

Lit up the world with smiles colored

like rainbows never-ending.

 

Flowers look upon her and gleam,

Prances ‘round daisys' and butterfly's wings,

Innocuous, intoxicating, exhilarating delight,

No one could compare to her parlor of dreams.

 

Amorous thief stole her bright shine,

Wiped his shiny shoes and said adieu,

Tears fell fast upon the earth and landslide

Took him asunder the hot burning earth,

 

Satan grinned for he excelled at his craft,

He asked why I am here, what did I do,

You split apart her heart and took her virtue,

Now she wears a veil, like you used to,

 

But she will dance again, unlike you.

The fires of love grows stronger every

Dawn and lights up the meadows with

Lilies that spawn laughter around the land,

 

You left her with blessings, and that I cannot stand!

So you will burn forever, searching for someone,

In the ashes of my darkness, I will give you my son,

Your filthy skin will melt like snow, for all eternity.

 

 So think twice young men, before you make a vow,

They are meant to be kept, so think carefully now.

Author's Note

Thanks to Ana, Will and Emily for help with my grammatical errors! Big Ooops! Will try to look much more carefully!

Reviews

[Sophy Freebirds]

ohh my!! Recently i was in dilemma whether to call my ex and wish him a new year... but now you have convinced me that i need to let him rot in hell for all i care!!
Talking seriously i like your power to weave such a lovely tale with a power of parable in it.. It gives the reader a delight . not only is the theme innocent but the style and usage of delicate phrases emphasize rhe purity. The flowers the fields the country setting give us a peaceful feeling.But the entry of Satan-Boom!! Makes the readers ready for a scary s**t! But it takes a turn and makes the devil pay.Thats really cool. :) i am happy i read you. *takecare*

~Sophy

[Confuser]

Sophy, it is for us to be kind; maybe not a good idea to call; but I wish you and everyone, happiness and peace. Thank you for reading; did this so quickly; you are a very good writer.

[Sophy Freebirds]

:-) i am humbled. thank you so much.Was a pleasure reading

[Confuser]

You are so kind. Thank you.

[Ana B.]

Wow, such a unexpected development, really intense and every word was rather felt than read. Exellent work Dale!

[R Smith]

well you got me running scared, won't be breaking any vows for some time lol, a truly magnificent work Dale, its great to see how you're becoming so great :)

[wordman]

great job on this write,i`m jealous

[Confuser]

Wow, thank you, you know I'd rather vomit that try to write love poems; so hard; guess what, just found one, that's not too bad. Better than this. Got to work on it. You are too nice. This is hard work.

[wordman]

maybe we can do a duet some time . I have the dam flu feel terrible

[Confuser]

That would be great! Hope you feel better; it would definitely kill me. Truly sorry. Hope you called the Dr. - there is something that can help a little.

[wordman]

yeap bourbon and coke

[Confuser]

What's going on? Hope you feel better! it would definitely kill me, the eternal optimist - see a Dr. - they have something. Truly hope you feel better. We can write anytime, you feel better!

[wordman]

have all kinds of ins,hate dr`s going to heart dr next week going to va dr in feb about over the flu
I am tough the flu shot didn`t work had some anti bionics and Tylenol have a sleep apnia machine put peppermint candy in it and breathed in it for a while worked pretty good

[Lenah Mehzabin]

Definately awesome !.. the way those harshness flowed ..u gave the poem perfection from every angle , a unique write certainly remind me of a old poem of mine ''Alive''
I enjoyed it so much !' great work