Belong

Belong

A Poem by Colton Warr

She belongs in the temporary moments of a dream 

Taking me away from my nightmare screams

On my knees for my sins, her love redeems

She has, to this day, been my one and only theme 

She belongs to an unknown planet out in space 

I am crash landing and so I brace

The way back home I never want to retrace

Forever we are to roam the stars, hands interlaced

She belongs in the great blue sky

If up is not the way then I have gone awry

We can lay with the clouds until we die

If her touch is the rain, I never want to be dry

She belongs to the vastness of the ocean

Which ever way her tide pulls, that is my motion

Like to the sand the waters soaks, she is my devotion

I have crashed into her like a wave and I love the commotion

She belongs to all of the wonders of our galaxy

She belongs to all of history’s kings and queens

She belongs to the Angel who plays the harp and sings

She belongs to every golden thing, yet here she is kissing me 

Reviews

[rickm97]

Love is the true sweetness of life. Nothing compares.
It is everything...
...in its absence we are nothing except lost, awaiting that gentle rush to overwhelm us once again.
It is life's greatest joy...
...and its greatest pain.
It is as a dichotomy in nature.
I miss her so.

Well done, my friend.
I hope that you find love as true as that of my Karin...
...for then you will have everything.

[Colton Warr]

I could have not said it any better than that, my friend! So beautiful! I can't even begin to imagine or comprehend how it would feel to lose someone as perfect as your wife must have been. And I know she was because she picked a strong and loving man to be with. You will see her again one day and you will get to be with her for all of eternity. I am so grateful that you read this piece!

P.S. It makes my soul happy that my words can remind you of someone who sounds like an angel. Just wanted to thank you for giving me that opportunity. Thank you for your support.

[rickm97]

She was the strong one, and she truly was an angel.
But she, like all of us, was flawed and had her struggles.
Life can get very ugly sometimes, and soon I'll try to depict her courage in dealing with it.
Thanks.

[Ibreez Shabkhez]

She belongs to no one and nothing my friend. And it is because she can choose to be content with kissing you, a maddening sinful mortal, that you can see her immortal splendor whether she stays or not... You really are a great guy though, just have to descend to people's level and show them that their little achievements are baby work for you. And if I am wrong, I am sorry, but I am guessing you were brought up with a lot of love; by very patient parents or guardians.

Try scanning your meter, it is actually very nicely mixed up. Even if it was done so accidentally, though I doubt it.

The rhymes are there but they refuse to make a song out of it. probably the effect of the longer meter , and the anapest substitutions slowing it down and letting the reader savor the taste of the love flowing in little but constant ripples.

The love is like diffusion after the gradient is balanced; there is a movement of particles in both directions, but the exact same amount. so there is no region of higher concentration and no region of lower concentration.

[Johnson Bobby]

beautiful moving the spiritual connection between two lovers over comes time and space
ones vortex can be share with another becoming one miracle / love is very hard to come
by true love that is / but then theres nothing better than love / that look in someones eye
that warmth the trust the giving of ones self / it plant a seed of eternity that grows for and
ever / and it makes seasons change in a second / for i shall never be cold again if look deeply
into your soul and just let love be your guide / for it waits to grow and grow and grow into a
flower in spring.

[Ewen A Morrison]

Dreams - poetry inspired by dreams! They are different...or are they? One may say they are. Yet, who among your readers can say they've not awakened, without that uncertain feeling?! "Did that really happen - or was I dreaming?
A very thought provoking poem, indeed! Such a poem sets off a train of thoughts/questioning - who wouldn't enjoy such experiences?

Thank you, I will certainly alert to more of this style, E

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much, Ewen! I appreciate the kind words! I'm glad you enjoyed this piece and were thought-provoked by its words. Thanks for giving this a read! I apologize for the late response!

[Katherine P. Haley]

This is such a great poem! Being not so hot at poetry myself, I always love read it from those who are actually good. Keep it up!

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much, Katherine! Your words are too sweet! Thank you very much for giving this a read! I apologize for the late response!

[Ashley Flynn]

Wow! This is gorgeous. I really love the powerful metaphors you draw on to describe this beloved woman. I love how you literally described her as being otherworldly, because that's how the ones we love feel to us. There are a couple of lines I would change for awkwardness.

Like,

"She belongs to the vastness of the ocean
Her tide pulls me in, I'm lost in the motion."

I'm not sure why sand would be devoted to the water that soaks it. That bit confused me.

I would remove the word temporary and replace it with fleeting.

"She belongs to the fleeting moments of dreams
Rescuing me from nightmarish screams,
On my knees for my sins, her love redeems,
And keeps me centered through life's extremes."

Lovely poem :)

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much, Ashley! I appreciate the kind words and I appreciate the advice! I will take it into consideration! Thank you so much for giving this a read! I apologize for the late response!

[Erin]

This is beautiful!! I love reading poems like this. Your writing style is lovely.

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so much, Erin! I'm glad you enjoyed this piece and I thank you for the kind words! I apologize for the late response!

[Steve L.]

Amazing to have such a deep, visceral connection with another soul...

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so much, my friend! I appreciate you stopping by and giving this a read! I apologize for the late response!

[Mara]

Another great poem, this is so beautiful

Love this line 'If her touch is the rain, I never want to be dry'

Thank for you sharing:)!

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much, Tee! Your words are too sweet! I'm glad you enjoyed this piece and that line! Thank you for the positivity! I appreciate you stopping by and checking this piece out!

[Bonaventure Onuabuchi]

This kiss has sent you to a pleasant dream that you're not thinking of coming away from it.. You really did a great work sir with the way you described the mistress and what her love is to you; able to transform every of your earthly things into pleasant imageries of heaven, angels and nature. Good work.... Bona!

[Colton Warr]

Thank you so much, my friend! Your words are too kind! I appreciate the positivity and encouragement! I love those last words; "angels of nature" that is beautiful and very true in the context of what this poem is about! Thank you so much for giving this a read!

[McBear]

This was beautiful my friend. Very well done!

[Colton Warr]

Thank you very much! I appreciate the kind words! I'm glad you enjoyed this piece! Thanks for stopping by and giving this a read!

[McBear]

:) Not a problem at all!