Silence Shout

I believe I might actually get some harsh criticism on this one... it's a slightly disconnected poem. I'm still posting it, even disconnected pieces mean something to someone.

I stand in a sea of people

hoping to be heard above the crowd

sadly knowing I am drowned out

by the collective voices of you

I shout so loud

it hurts my lungs

but when it's time

I will be heard

I wait for my turn

in the line of life

to get a chance

to plead my case

what happens next

is of no surprise

I’m turned away

my quiet shout

So I stand in silence

wondering what to do

now that you have quieted

the very heart of me

I cannot scream

I cannot yell

yet something must happen

to break this spell

of hate and malice

destined for dread

that runs in my soul

and pounds in my head

do not silence my shout

for you know not where I’ve been

I have rights

you will see

Fight hard

win your war

but shout to the world

no more

for winning is losing

in all sense of meaning

and in that regard

you lose your being

So wait your turn

and keep your shout

silent in nature

we will hear you out.

Reviews

[A. Amos]

Coll my man, what a deep and magical poetry loved it. Every single verse amazed me and the sense of your feeling in each poetry of yours is simply amazing. We need strong writing like yours to understand what is happening around and why are we left out. Bravo

[Coll Silvermoon]

Thank you, Amos. I am speechless. You have moved me!

[A. Amos]

Can't wait to buy your work my friend, you are not good but great.

[Coll Silvermoon]

WOW, thank you AMOS!!!

[A. Amos]

Have you written any story yet?

[Coll Silvermoon]

not recently.. nothing i have ready to publish. I enjoy writing poetry too much :)

[A. Amos]

That I have felt you are deep but yet soul with very unique feelings, your readers will feel and love to connect with you.

[Kai Rollins]

I had to read this a second time to even try and grasp the fullness of this. I'm rather new to your works but I'm quite impressed. This was a brilliant write.

[Coll Silvermoon]

Thank you Kai. That really means a lot.

[Shaquana Adams]

"do not silence my shout
for you know not where I’ve been
I have rights
you will see"

Beautifully stated! Great job! :)

[Coll Silvermoon]

Thank you Shaquana

[Shaquana Adams]

You're welcome ^-^

[Carolann Dowsett]

The world is so full of chaos and the never ending noise of the multitudes. I love this, it's a battle cry of sorts and stands in strength.

[Coll Silvermoon]

And it is how I feel, day to day. It's frustrating how you have a voice, yet you are not heard.

[Carolann Dowsett]

Yes I know how you feel. But keep at, it if you want to be heard eventually you will be.

[B.J]

Life's justice ...I like it..

I cannot scream

I cannot yell

yet something must happen

to break this spell

I really like this stanza, it screamed out to me because it was not long ago I felt like that, actually I felt like I was reading my life

[Coll Silvermoon]

Thank you, Barb, this makes my heart soar!

[B.J]

Your welcome

[Lyn Anderson]

I really like this. There are a few minor corrections: Did you want drowned out? Also it's time. One other question, was it intentional to mix capital I with little "i"?

[Coll Silvermoon]

capital and lowercase mix was not intentional, it was quick typing. and i did want drowned out. sometimes I'm bad with apostrophe.
Thank you for this !!!

[Lyn Anderson]

No problem. I am kind of OCD when it comes to these little things, and love to help people who do not take offense at correction. I hate it when I forget something and nobody tells me.:)

[Coll Silvermoon]

I made the corrections :)

[Brittany Zedalis]

Too often those who deserve to be heard are ignored.

[Coll Silvermoon]

YAY! whew... you got the whole poem... it didn't sound too disconnected?

[Brittany Zedalis]

Nope. It made sense to me.