On Simplicity ...

free verse; experimental

There's a moment before

a smile comes to life,

as there's a moment

when a clock's hand

ceases to mark the hour ...

and in that moment,

a lily dances ...

rain rises from the ground

to kiss forsaken skies,

and a woman's tears

drench the earth,

giving rhythm 

to another's smile.

Author's Note

I doubt this makes sense outside my own mind, but I'd still like to know your thoughts and interpretations. Please leave an honest review. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Reviews

[Sapientiam]

Regardless on whether you yourself understands this poem, many readers can come up with their ideas on it because it is a very imaginative piece. I don't exactly know what the meaning is, but I saw it as portraying the moment in time before a smile flourishes on someone's face, that gap where all expectations will come true and true joy expresses itself. It's funny how I found this poem today because yesterday I had to make a speech in front of a large audience and before I spoke, I smiled at one person. That person smiled back, and it caused a chain reaction. I think this poem is also talking about the benevolent influence that one's joy can have on others, either internal or external. The mere sight of a smile can change someone's life, I learned... Great job!

[William Liston]

Thank you for sharing your interpretation. It was interesting to read. I greatly appreciate your review.

[lightsong]

That's me again! I was thinking to drop here a little and say hello to You, how are You dear William :)

I didn't think I will see a review from me a year back lol, reading this again forced me to give You another review, You know dear William, You don't need to worry about if it makes any sense or not, when genuine feelings being written they are not meant to make sense, but to be felt, the lure of feelings that they might not make any sense! not knowing why such words might caress the core of You, the senses of You, and have such an enchanting power, only a mater of emotion can convey genuine feelings in the genuine way You do, here today I read it again... and I was thinking if there are more beautiful meaningful words in the most profound touching simple way, in a homage of a woman, in the respectful deeply knowing way You did, I think of a mother, of a Goddess, gifting... sacrificing to give life on earth....

never the brilliance of Your captivating poem has lessened with time, smile William and be proud that You've wrote this, Hugs***

[Kelly Scheppers]

...you are good for what troubles the soul, Will...beautiful pen, my friend!

[William Liston]

Thank you for your uplifting words, Kelly.

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

It seems to be about that moment on the cusp of creation when only the creation knows of its impending arrival. We are privy to its existence only after it arrives, but o! what a beauty to behold. There is so much promise in those moments.

[William Liston]

That's an eloquent way to put it.
Thank you for reviewing.

[Black Jess]

I didn't really understand this poem , but I can see a powerfull meaning and wide imagination . What I got from the 1st stanza is that : our life is delimited between the moment we were born ( when a smile comes to life ) and the moment we die ( when a clock's hand cease to mark an hour )

and from the 2nd stanza : during this life , there will be joy and happy days ( from the meaning of lily dances and rain rises from the ground ) but of course tears will be shed but it will pass and we'll smile again !

Anyway , I found this piece very original and beautiful , Great Job !

[William Liston]

I'm glad you enjoyed. Thank you for reviewing and sharing your interpretation.

[JessyJacob]

Poets live in imagination have influence on one's life, who will write and enjoy such imaginations, those who are very happy, they only do timepass affecting people. They say people are fighting for eternal happiness, because they have never seen happiness at all, yes, with so many artistic skills, how a labour working in contruction site, lifitng sand, to feed his stomach for his livelihood, will have time to write such poems and enjoy the imagination. No time for sex, you know , lol (very embarrassingly laughing at poets imagination influencing people's life).

Please dont delete my comment, it should be read by everybody, who is influencing people's life, with their luxurious imaginations, saying you poor labour, you dont have emotions. God knows who really cared for whose emotions, they say, i am rich in heart and i need this type of style.

[William Liston]

I agree. Imagination is an important part of being a poet.
Thank you for your kind words.

[Paradox]

I know not what the interpretation of the second stanza will be. But, the words and phrases and finally the rhythm of this verse, it leaves an undying impression on one's mind. I am still trying to interpret the poem properly. Great piece u have posted... I shall like to read more of yours.

[William Liston]

Thank you for your kind words. I barely understand what I was trying to say in this piece myself, so it's okay if you can't understand it. For as long as it makes you feel something.

[Paradox]

Yeah. I still cant understand it. But it hardly matters now. The impression of this poem is still left on my mind.

[Shweta]

"and a woman's tears
drench the earth,
giving rhythm
to another's smile"
I do not know what is intended here still i suppose a woman to be like mother earth here and through her tears ( here sacrifice) she is giving life (here rhythm to be rhythm of life) or being a reason for another's smile...i can be entirely wrong...there is something intriguing in this write...keep going

[William Liston]

Hello Shwetz : )
I'm glad you enjoyed this piece.
As for the line you pointed out, you're pretty much spot-on with your interpretation.

[Shweta]

I liked the intrigue factor in this write...there is scope for continuity and improvement..the experiment was worth trying

[Relic]

Well, time does stop when you are taken by another's looks. Love is developed slowly and must take a little work, but lily's still dance if you know how to keep the fire alive.

[William Liston]

Such a poetic review : )
Thank you for reading.

[Mary]

William, I am reminded of that pause before the event, the instant that cannot be measured, and what happens during the time of the pause? the impossible, that's what! lilies dance, rain falls up, and to quote Stephen King, we all go todash for a bit and new realities are discovered. I like this poem, it acknowledges the reality of the " instant before." I used to teach physics, and according to physics theory, we always use the term instant, but an instant really doesn't exist, not even for an instant. Beautiful write, wonderful imagery.

[William Liston]

Thank you for your lovely review. I'm glad you enjoyed.