Unable

          As I helplessly watch my love.
          Suffer through her crsis.
          Each tear has it prayer.
          That she won't end up lifeless.
          The temperature is freezing
          And I guess it stand for prepareness.
          I want to look away from her aching pain.
          But I refuse to feel like I abandon her struggle.
          Why would she? and how could she?
          Make a horrified attemp to where.
          She will be departed from my heart and soul.
         Is this a dream? if so my lord I ask you.
         To awake me for it is worst than a nightmare.
         It's hell in a awaking wishing I could heal.
         And wash away her deep wounds of pain.
        But the more I wish, the more I have a guiltful feeling.
        My love listen as I output words from my heart.
        I'm willing to make a trade your life for my life.
        For in my eyes it's only right.
        But I know that will never be.
        And that's the thing that really get to me.
           

Reviews

[Nicky Wilson]

This was well written apart form some minor errors, good job keep on writing :)

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

The sheer emotion and powerful resemblance of ticked feeling helps the reader to evoke the imagery of raw passion and yearning. A clearly researched and felt piece, well done, great read.

[pia Z]

I love how emotional your poems are. They've got a really beautiful emotional core to them and the voice sounds so wonderfully genuine. I love that every line ends with a period. It's a small thing, but the punctuation really makes this piece. Every line is a statement, and it's powerful to read that kind of conviction in a poem. Thank you so much for sharing it.