The End

‘There’s no place like my room’- Phoebe Bridgers

You drove us home
Bought hot chocolate and kept us warm
It’ll be the most surreal Christmas morning
The sky’s as worn out as a kids favorite book
Every young word
Every brilliant idea reflecting in the brook
Back then it was so easy
But do these pages still need me?

We remain
In the deepest corner of the diner
The night sky and digital stars are spinning
And you’re still whistling
Every trumpet ever played
Is what it feels like being on stage

And the cacti has all been struck
And the town is talking about the dark clouds
They’ll know about the world alone
But they’ll never come in as long as I’m around

It’s storming and the top is down
We got lost in California acting like clowns
It’s all gonna be okay
Is what the twinkling red moon says
A volcano full of dust
Forgiving clovers and a lane
Coffee and a bitter taste
Life feels so much cleaner
I wish I could relive those few golden days
There something’s scary about how you won’t come around

There was something about 2021
A restart of all the fun

Watching that glass break
It still really really hurts
It reminded me of the me before I met you
Falling forever
But I think it’s finally coming together
Every lyric
Every chorus is melting
And I’m on the mend
I’ll dethrone that damn king
I’ll be the best usurper anyone has ever seen

I want the credits
I want the points
Or I’ll blow this joint
Bubbles reflect California night
God, it was beautiful
I wanted to see the Christmas lights with you
I just think there’s something about you
Something hidden in you
That’s adorable!
They think a mangy homeless cat standing up for itself was treason, think it was horrible

And now my ribs are broke
The truth to make you choke
You’re sorta stupidly self aware
The day you left the day I learned you didn’t care
I wish I could remember this feeling forever
So I wouldn’t have another break down f*****g ever
It’s 11:11, make a wish
Another bag of tricks

I was living in the nightmare realm
The only one at the helm
And I think I’m losing my touch
After that sweet rush

This isn’t where the garden ends
We’ll meet again
make amends
And I don’t know if it’ll chime true
But I’m here with you

The world is about to be torn up
Good thing we have a backup

I wish the dawn would stay purple
For f*****g ever
So I wouldn’t have to have another damn breakdown ever
From the ashes of a rebellions ending
Realities are blending
And I’m the ruler, lord, king and queen
I’m sending the message out to the other lands
I’ve taken my dreams hand
While we watch the flames all choke in sand

I’m not your loyal subject anymore
I’m the vertigo you’ll feel forevermore

Author's Note

2022, you’ll get to see all of my poetry, bare bones. There’s stories to be told.

Reviews

[Rick Puetter]

A very open and powerful poem. Greatly enjoyed the raw emotion. And I like your style. Unlike other free-style poets on this site, you get the point that a poetry line should be a full thought and not just chopped up because the line is getting long. So the flow of your words feels natural. And you are succinct in your words, we naurally lead to short line and powerful writing. The is no waste in your lines. And your break between stanzas is also natural and unforced. You know how to write in free verse, and make a powerful delivery.

All my best,

Rick

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you, so so much. This poem means so much to me. When people enjoy the way I set it up and the flow, it’s an incredible feeling, like I’m the writer always wanted to be, lol . Thank you for leaving such a kind review and reading such a long poem. Endlessly appreciated (:

[Dave Brown]

This is considerably more in length, depth and seriousness than anything I am inclined to write,
I usually fall asleep before I get this far, so I applaud your ability and longevity.
Some very good parts here but I think I like most your two opening lines.
They gave me a sense of oomphy, cozy compatibility.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! I appreciate the review so much.

[LJ]

So much is packed in here! and still a reader sees most images clearly, with a certain thread of continuity almost obvious. I admire the California references, and of course see some 'bitter' here that I hope, if true, (I think it all is) is easing now. Maybe the new year will bring new interests, but keep the good things around. Like writing. The past couple of years have been hard on many of us for a variety of reasons, and I think the intensity caused by the pandemic has exacerbated emotions that might otherwise go unnoticed. As for you, I have a feeling you're always this intense and intimate. I'm glad. This is poetry to read more than once or twice. This is poetry to enjoy a long time. Thank you!

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this so thoroughly- I always appreciate reviews so much, but ones like yours really show caring. Thank you so, so much!

[M. J. Smith]

Well now... Definitely some anger here. This old drifter does not want to hazard a guess as to what you have survived. Reminds of the spoken word videos on YouTube. You'd fit right in. Probably Garner top views. A lot to say and powerful language to say it with.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much- I’d actually love to read it out on YouTube, and may be an eventual channel!

[M. J. Smith]

I'll lay it again, Sam. You' d probably get too views! 😀
You're most welcome.

[Lisasview]

This poem read like a story in a book I just could not put down..Really interesting read.
Lisa

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so, so much! That was actually the point and I’m so glad you felt that way. I appreciate it endlessly (:

[Lisasview]

You are so welcome!! Good morning from Spain, Lisa

[Chris Shaw]

You pour forth here like a gushing stream with your random thoughts about the year that has just passed. I enjoy how your mind wanders as you talk to the reader. Your thoughts here flow well and I always appreciate a smattering of rhyme. You take the reader to the scene. Happy new year.

Chris

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so, so much for the kind review! I appreciate it as always.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

in the end, you are not what I wanted or needed...
breathless is this poem, written in that confessional style of some of the Beats.
I could wrap up your first stanza and put in my pocket...I just want to hold it.

j.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so, so much for the review. It’s appreciated endlessly!

[Carlos Lorenzo Estrada]

Keep writing your truth Colacat. Never stop expressing to the world as you see it. Yours is a strong voice in expressive poetry and seeing your influences I can see why. Looking forward to what you have in store for us in your art. This was a wonderful start for the new year.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much, I always appreciate your reviews. I’m so glad you enjoyed it (:

[Betty Hermelee]

Reminiscing about 2021, mot of which seems almost harrowing, sad, looking back on a relationship turned sour and how one reacts to that, some disturbing words come forth ….scattered thoughts….now the ruler comes forth….not a subject anymore; catharsis has brought you to a better place.
Best
Betty

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! I appreciate the review as always, it means so, so much to me.

[Betty Hermelee]

You're very welcome! And welcome back!
Best, B.