Chlorine In The Black Coffee

'Used to be one of the rotten ones and I liked you for that.'- Broken Social Scene.

Wake up

To white picket fences

How do I

Keep getting into this messes?

You run through the midnight roses

Looking for a home

But soon enough, they grow thorns

Chlorine in the pool

Does loving you make me a fool?

The air conditoner on

You promised to follow each day

But you gave my night sky heart away

Glitter shimmering on the uneasy floor

The cat pushes it's way into the door

If we beat them to the front

We beat them back again

Then maybe one day

We can be friends

And it won't have to end

Give me back

Your black hotel coffee lists

You're the one I miss

Sunday car on the highway

Going to make haunted ride water memories

We drove through the canyons

But you were the only sight I was seeing

Quiet curtain calls and barn wishes

Do your worst

Give me stitches

Is rhyming and metaphors what my life will be?

You were my biggest grand plan

But without you, I crumble into sand

Author's Note

I really love writing poetry based on my stories. This one is based on one of the sequel stories to LA Devotee, which I actually miss quite a bit. It may come back, you never know! Also, expect plenty of poems coming! I've been on a huge poetry writing spree. Have a wonderful day!

Reviews

[Betty Hermelee]

I love the juxtaposition of your words; seems like someone took your heart and threw it away, at least for a while, but you wouldn’t mind being friends again; the way you structured the poem is really excellent…. You are deriding , but hoping to love again at least have part of it.
Well done!
Best, B.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! I'm so glad you liked it, thank you. (:

[MoriartyMesa]

https://youtu.be/DmeUuoxyt_E

[Shelley Warner]

That was a sad poem :( The emotions were beautifully described. Especially in the last line "Without you I crumble into sand". I also liked the part about riding through the canyons but only having eyes for the loved one.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Hey, thank you so much! I'm so glad you enjoyed it so much. (:

[Shelley Warner]

You're welcome.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I really love the imagery in this...and it reminded me of that song..."If lovin' you is wrong, I don't wanna be right!"
Excellent piece with lots of emotion tugging at its sleeve.
j.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much! Yes, I did indeed have that song in mind at one part, haha! Have a wonderful day!

[Chris Shaw]

You were my biggest grand plan
But without you I crumble into sand

Life is like that. It has a habit of kicking you in the teeth. Your lovely sand castles are lost when the tide comes in. Such a tone of disappointment here Colacat.

Chris

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Yes, life is often very cruel like that, unfortunately. Thank you so much for the review!

[Chris Shaw]

Just read a second time and the imagery really stood out for me :)
A good read.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

Thank you so much again! I'm very happy you enjoyed it. (:

[Poetic Beauty]

Wishful thinking and longing mixed in with everyday routines.

[Vertigo Cat1111]

That’s just about right! Thank you so much for the review. (: