Panic!

The alien ship lifted off, and as I watched the earth shrink below I could tell I was in trouble.

I turned around. It was a rather dank setting. There were others like me huddled around, chained to each other. The aliens appeared--looked like walking garbage cans; they had balloons attached to their bodies, with little smily faces colored on them, no doubt to set us at ease but it was a failed gesture making them all the more horrifying.

 

They greeted me cordially, speaking in a human voice of unknown origin. Told me not to be frightened. I wasn't paying attention though--too frightened. I picked the alien leader up and tossed him overboard, into space, and he began falling down to earth.

 

The other balloon-headed garbagecan-mans turned, faced each other in deliberation, and then declared me to be their new leader.

 

Been cruising around the galaxy (without a liscence to drive, I might add,) ever since. I still visit earth every once in a while--I let the other captives go, then made a quick trip to the DMV and blew it to smitherines before lifting back into space.

 

All in all, it's been pretty fun. But lately, there's been a squadren of space-vampires has been chasing me around, hell bent on revenge. I didn't even do anything to get on their bad side--they say I've insulted them somehow, but I don't know what they're talking about. My assessments about their ugliness were very astute, accurate, and fair. Some people just don't know how to take critisism.

Author's Note

Written in nine minutes.

Reviews

[Hedra Helix]

haha love it, you're a man of your word;) 2 fold. good s**t.



oldschool edit.



The alien ship lifted off, and as I watched the earth shrink below I could tell I was in trouble.
I turned around. It was a rather dank setting. There were others like me huddled (around/re?), chained to each other.
The aliens appeared--looked like walking garbage cans; they had balloons attached to their bodies(,/re?) with (little/re) smil(e)y faces colored on them, no doubt to set us at ease(.) b(B)ut it was a failed gesture(,) (making/re?)(it just made) them all the more horrifying.

They greeted me cordially, speaking in a human voice of unknown origin (Japanese maybe?). Told me not to be (so) frightened. I wasn't paying attention though--too frightened. I picked the alien leader up and tossed him overboard, into space, and he began falling down to(ward) earth.

The other balloon-headed garbagecan-ma(e?)ns turned, faced each other in deliberation, and then declared me to be their new leader. (Luck gene?)

Been cruising around the galaxy (without a liscence to drive, I might add,)